Ugogo nogogo kumele basebenze izinkinga ngokunakekelwa
Kuyinto inhlekelele ngogogo nomkhulu lapho benqatshelwe ukuxhumana nabazukulu. Kungaba buhlungu kakhulu kubazukulu, futhi. Nakuba ukufuna amalungelo okuvakasha kungenzeka, ukugwema izingxabano zomndeni ezinjalo kuyadingeka kakhulu.
Ukuziphatha-Ukuhlukana Kokuziphatha Nogogo Nomkhulu
Ngezinye izikhathi abazali baqinisile ukuphika ugogo nomkhulu ukuxhumana nabazukulu.
Abantu abahlukumeza ngokocansi, izidakamizwa noma abahlukumezi bezidakamizwa bavame ukuhlanza izenzo zabo ngenxa yokuthi baba ngogogo nomkhulu, futhi abazali banelungelo lokungafuni izingane zabo zizungeze.
Abazali nabo banelungelo lokuphika ukuxhumana nogogo nomkhulu abaphula imithetho yomzali mayelana nokuphepha. Ugogo nomkhulu abathutha abazukulu ngaphandle kokusebenzisa ukuvimbela imoto efanelekile akufanele bavunyelwe ukushayela abazukulu noma kuphi. Okufanayo kuya noma yimuphi omunye umthetho wokuphepha owakhiwe ngabazali, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ugogo nomkhulu bayavumelana noma cha. Uma ukwephula akuyona kakhulu, abazali bangase bacabangele ukuvumela ugogo nomkhulu ukuba babone abazukulu, kodwa kuphela ngaphansi kwezimo ezilawulwayo.
Ezinye izenzo zogogo nomkhulu ezingabangela kalula ukungqubuzana komndeni zihlanganisa lokhu okulandelayo:
- Ukuvimbela igunya lomzali noma ukukhuthaza izingane ukuba zingamlaleli abazali
- Ukukhuluma kabi kwamanye amalungu omndeni, njengabazali, ababelethi noma omunye ugogo nomkhulu
- Ukwenqaba ukulandela imithetho yabazali mayelana nokudla, ukuhamba kwe-TV, izikhathi zokulala nokunye okunjalo
- Ukunikeza izipho abazukulu abazali abangayithandi
- Ukucindezela abazali ukuxhumana okwengeziwe, njengokuvakashelwa ebusuku, lapho abazali besaba.
Imindeni kufanele ikwazi ukuxazulula le ndaba engathí sina ngaphandle kokunqamula ukuxhumana phakathi kwabazali nomkhulu nabazukulu, kodwa ukubheja okungcono ukugwema ukuziphatha okunjalo kuqala.
Izinsongo ekufinyeleleni okujwayelekile
Ukugwema ukuziphatha kabi komkhulu nomkhulu, ukulindela umthetho ukuthi ogogo nomkhulu bangafinyelela kubazukulu babo ngomzali ongumntwana wabo. Lokhu kulindeleke ukuba kube yiqiniso emindenini eqondile futhi lapho abazali bengasekho ndawonye. Ngezinye izikhathi, noma kunjalo, umzali osebenza njengothukulu lomzukulu wabazali uyahluleka ukuxhumana nawo. Lokhu kungahle kwenzeke ngenxa yezizathu eziningana, okuyingozi kunazo zonke, yiqiniso, ukufa komzali. Ezinye izimo ezinzima zihlanganisa:
- Abazali abangashadile, futhi ubaba akaqinisekanga amalungelo akhe omzali.
- Umzali uyeka amalungelo akhe omzali.
- Umzali uboshiwe.
- Umzali uvinjelwe ekuboneni ingane ngenxa yokusebenzisa kabi izidakamizwa, ukwephula ucansi noma into efanayo.
- Umzali ogcinwe esitokisini uhamba ibanga elide nogogo nomkhulu.
- Umzali ovame ukunikeza ukufinyelela kubazukulu uhamba ibanga elide.
Esinye isimo esivamile esenza ukuba ugogo nomkhulu bahlukaniswe nabazukulu babo yilapho abazali beyizidakamizwa. Abazali abasebenzisa ngokwemvelo bafuna ukugcina imikhuba yabo imfihlo. Isibonelo esivamile ukuthi ekuqaleni basebenzisa ugogo nomkhulu njengabazali, bevumela abazali ukuba banelungelo lokuzijwayeza.
Uma ugogo nomkhulu bebheka lokho okwenzekayo, noma umlutha wababelethi uba nzima kangangokuthi kunzima ukufihla, abazali bavame ukuphuka nogogo nomkhulu, ukuba banqabe ukuthi kungenzeka yini. Ukuhlukana komndeni okunjalo kungaba kubi kakhulu futhi kungafaka ugogo nomkhulu esimweni esingenakuphikiswa sokufuna amalungelo okuvakasha.
Ezinye izimpikiswano zomndeni
Okunye ukungqubuzana okungathí sina kungaholela ekuhlukananeni komndeni. Ngokwesazi sokusebenza kwengqondo uMarsha L. Shelov, izimo ezintathu zingabangela izingxabano phakathi kwabazali nogogo nomkhulu:
- Abazali nonogogo nomkhulu bayavumelani ngezindaba ezinjengenkolo.
- Kunezingxabano zobuntu phakathi kogogo nomkhulu nomzali; Izingxabano zomamazana / umalokazana zivame kakhulu.
- Izingxabano ezindala zomzali nengane "zigeleza esizukulwaneni esilandelayo."
Lezi yizinkinga ezingabangela izingxabano zomndeni ezinzima kepha lokho kungase kuphazamiseke uma ogogo nomkhulu bebambisana futhi behlala. Njengoba kunzima ukuthi kungaba nogogo nomkhulu okholelwa ukuthi bayakulungile, ukunikeza okuncane kungcono kakhulu ukuyeka ukuxhumana nabazukulu. Ukwelulekwa komndeni kungasiza ekubhekaneni nezingxabano ezibuhlungu kakhulu, ikakhulukazi uma zibandakanya izingxabano ezingalaliswanga zabazali nengane.
Ezinye izingxabano zomndeni zithinta imali. Ugogo nomkhulu abafaka imali ngezingane zabo ngezinye izikhathi bangesabisa ukusika usizo lwezezimali ngaphandle kokuba kube nemibandela ethile. Ugogo nomkhulu okhetha ukunikeza usizo lwezimali kufanele banikeze ngokukhululekile futhi bayeke ukusebenzisa imali njengendlela yokulawula. Ngaphandle kwalesi simiso, yiqiniso, lapho ogogo nomkhulu bevuma ukukhokhela esikoleni samabanga aphansi, ekolishi noma izifundo ezikhethekile noma ukuqeqesha abazukulu babo. Kulezi zimo, banelungelo lokufuna ukuthi iminikelo yabo isetshenziswe njengoba kuchaziwe.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, abazali bangasebenzisa ukuxhumana nabazukulu ngendlela efanayo, ngokusongela ukuthintana noxhumana ngaphandle uma kudingwa izimali zezimali. Abazali abaye bathola imali mboleko kunogogo nomkhulu bangase banqume othintana nabo ukunciphisa ingcindezi yokukhokha imali. Noma yikuphi ukuthengiswa kwezimali phakathi kwezizukulwane kufanele kubhekwe ngamehlo ezimpikiswaneni ezingahle zenziwe.
Ukungqubuzana Okuvamile Komuntu Noma Ukuphazamiseka Kwengqondo?
Bobabili abazali kanye nogogo nomkhulu ababandakanyeka ekuphikisaneni ngezinye izikhathi bachaza ezinye izinhlangothi njengokuphazamiseka kwengqondo. Amacala avamile ukuthi elinye iqembu liqambimanga, liyi-bipolar noma libhekene ne-narcissistic personality disorder. Izindleko ezinjalo zivame ukubonakala kumazwana athunyelwe kwi-Internet kulabo abathintekayo emibangweni yomndeni. Ngezinye izikhathi abantu ababuzwayo baye bathola ukuthi bane-disorder, futhi ngezinye izikhathi othile udlala ngeso lengqondo ye-amateur. Uma umzali noma ugogo nomkhulu ehilelekile empikiswaneni ngokugula ngengqondo, kufanele kwenziwe yonke imizamo yokuthola usizo. Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukulinganisa amacala anjalo komunye umuntu ngenxa yokungavumelani kuyanyundela futhi kungaphikisana nokukhiqiza. Kungcono ukugxila ekuxazululweni kwemibango.
Imiphakathi ye-Breaching
Inkinga evamile phakathi kwezizukulwane ibangelwa ugogo nomkhulu abangahloniphi imingcele. Lolu hlobo lwecala lungathatha ifomu lokuphula imingcele yemvelo, njengokungena emalungwini omndeni nokungena ngaphandle kokushaya. Lapho imingcele ephulwayo imingcele phakathi kokubeletha nokukhulisa izingane, ukuphulwa komthetho kuyingozi kakhulu.
Lesi simo sivame ukubonakala lapho abazali abasha befuna usizo kanye nogogo nomkhulu bacabanga ukuthi bazali. Ngezinye izikhathi ugogo nomkhulu bayazicabangela ukugcina. Ngokuvamile bahlinzeka ukunakekelwa kwezingane futhi kaningi usizo lwezezimali. Uma abazali benquma ukubuyisela amalungelo abo okubeletha, ogogo nomkhulu ngezinye izikhathi bakhathazeka ukuwayeka. Ngokuvamile umphumela wukuthi ugogo nomkhulu osondelene kakhulu nabazukulu babo banqunywe kubo abazali abafuna ukubuyisela umthamo wabo wokubeletha. Ogogo nodade ohlakaniphileyo bagwema ukuqhuma okunjalo ngokucela ukubekezela kwabazali njengoba benza ushintsho futhi ngokuvuselela ithuba lokujabulela abazukulu babo njengogogo nomkhulu kunokuba babe nemithwalo yemfanelo eminingi yendima yabazali.