Kukhona okuthile okuphathelene nendodakazi nabadade, akunjalo? Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yini, lawo maantombazane amancane abonakala sengathi okhokho aboshwe ngeminwe yabo encane-lawo mahlo amakhulu, lawo ma-pigtails amancane, lezo zandla zifinyelela kubababa bazo ngokubamba.
Futhi uma uke wazibuza ukuthi kukhona yini umehluko phakathi kothando lukababa nendodakazi kanye nothando lukababa nendodana, isayensi empeleni isho ukuthi kukhona umehluko omncane.
Ucwaningo olusha luhlolisisa umehluko phakathi kobaba abasebenzisana namadodana abo namadodakazi abo, ngokuthola okuthakazelisayo.
Isifundo
Isifundo, esenziwa e-Emory University futhi eshicilelwe encwadini ye- Behavioral Neuroscience , safunda ukusebenzisana phakathi kobaba nabantwana babo bobabili besilisa isikhathi esingaphezu kwezinsuku ezimbili. Kwakusekelwe emibhalweni eyedlule yokuthi abazali baphatha abantwana besilisa nabesilisa ngendlela ehlukile futhi benethemba lokufakazela ukuthi le mbono yayiyiqiniso ngempela.
Abacwaningi babehlose ukuqoqa ulwazi mayelana nokuthi obaba bahlanganyela kanjani nezingane zabo, bebuka ukuthi bakhulume kanjani nezingane, yiziphi amagama abazisebenzisa, nokuziphatha kwabo bonke. Bonke ndawonye, amantombazane angama-30 amancane kanye nabafana abangu-22 abancane bahlanganyela kulolu cwaningo. Obaba bezingane babegqoke amarekhodi akhethekile emabhande abo kokubili usuku lwamaviki kanye nesonto, okwenzeka ngokungahleliwe futhi babhala izingxoxo zabo nanoma yini enye, njengokucula noma ukudlala imisindo yomsebenzi.
Okutholakele
Ekupheleni kwalolu cwaningo, abacwaningi bathola ukuthi obaba basebenzisa isikhathi esingaphezu kwamaphesenti angama-60 "ukuphendula ngokucophelela" emadodakazini abo nangendlela abaphendula ngayo emadodaneni abo. Baye bachitha isikhathi esiningi ngokuphindaphindiwe kasikhombisa ukuthi bahlanganyele ngezindlela ezingenalutho, njengokucula nokushaya ngezimpi namadodakazi abo.
Futhi ekugcineni, obaba bachitha isikhathi esiningi bexoxa ngokukhululekile ngemizwelo yabo, kuhlanganise nokudabuka, namantombazane. Babesebenamathuba amaningi okusebenzisa amagama afana ne "ukukhala" futhi "abodwa," ukuchaza imizwelo yabo nokuthi yiziphi imizwa amantombazane ababhekana nayo.
Futhi mhlawumbe ngokuzwakalayo, obaba basebenzisa amagama amaningi agxile emzimbeni wendodakazi yabo, kuhlanganise "amanoni," "izinyawo," "isisu," nesimo "ubuso." Nakuba konke ukusebenzisana kwakungenacala, abacwaningi babesazibuza ukuthi ngabe iqiniso elincane lokuthi amantombazane afunda ukukhokha kakhulu ukubukeka kwawo, adlala indima ekuthuthukiseni isithombe sesikhathi eside .
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, obaba bahlanganyela kakhulu emzimbeni namadodana abo, bechitha kathathu imisebenzi eminingi efana nokwehluleka ukudlala. Baye bavame ukusebenzisa ulimi oluthe xaxa olubonisa ukuphumelela, njengamagama afaka "ukuziqhenya," "ukunqoba," noma "okuhle."
Ngokuthakazelisayo, lolu cwaningo lwathola nokuthi akuyona nje ubaba ophatha amadodakazi abo ngendlela ehlukile, kodwa ukuthi indlela ababuchopho babo abasabela ngayo emadodaneni abo ahluke ngempela. Ngakho-ke indlela obaba abhekwa ngayo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi iminyaka eminingi yokuphila komphakathi noma enye into, ukuphatha amadodakazi abo ngendlela ehlukile.
Okushiwo yiSifundo
Nakuba ukutadisha kubheka okuthakazelisayo iqiniso lokuthi obaba bahlangana nabo, bakhulume, futhi benze ngendlela ehlukile emadodaneni abo namadodana abo, kusengasitsheli ngokuphelele ukuthi kungani. Kufana nenkukhu noma yeqanda: Ingabe amantombazane afunda ukuziphatha okuthile ngendlela abazali babo abaphatha ngayo noma obaba bawaphatha ngendlela ethile ngenxa yokuziphatha kwamadodakazi? Umbuzo onzima abacwaningi bacabanga ukuthi unezici eziningi-ukukhuliswa kwabazali, ukuxhaphaza kwezenhlalo, kanye "nezindinganiso" zobulili bonke badlala ingxenye.
Isibonelo, iqiniso lokuthi obaba basebenzisa amagama amaningi ukuchaza imizwelo namantombazane angabasiza bafunde ukukhulumisana imizwa yabo kangcono futhi bahlakulele ukuzwelana kwabanye.
Ngokusho kochwepheshe abaningi, abazali nabadala bangase badlulisele izingane zabo ngokweqile ngokobulili ngezenzo zabo nokuthi baziphatha kanjani ngaphandle kokuqaphela. Ngakho-ke izifundo ezifana nalezi zingasiza abazali bavule amehlo abo ukuthi bangaphatha kanjani izingane zabo ngokuhlukile ngokusekelwe kobulili babo futhi okubaluleke kakhulu, ukuthi bangashintsha kanjani ukuziphatha kwabo esikhathini esizayo.
Ongakwenza
Ucwaningo lwangaphambili lubonise ukuthi abazali abafuni ukuvuma ukuthi baphatha izingane zabo ngokuhlukile, okuqondakalayo. Kodwa isifundo sibalulekile ukusisiza sibone izindlela ezehlukene esingasiza ngazo abantwana bazo zonke izihlobo ukuthuthukisa. Uma ungumzali wamadodana, isibonelo, ungase ufune ukuchitha isikhathi esengeziwe ukhuluma nendodana yakho mayelana nemizwelo, usebenzisa amagama akhethekile ukubiza imizwelo noma ukukhuluma ngemizwelo yakho.
> Imithombo:
Mascaro, J. et al. (2017). Izithonya zobulili ezinganeni zokuziphatha, ulimi, nokusebenza kobuchopho. Isayensi ye-Neuroscience, 131 (3), p. 262-273 Ukubuyiswa kusuka ku-http: //www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/bne-bne0000199.pdf