Ukuhlola Izizathu Abazali Banikeza Ukushaya Amantombazane Abo
Ukujeziswa ngabantwana kuyisihloko esakha ukuphikisana okukhulu nokuphikisana. Nakuba ochwepheshe bezempilo nentuthuko yengane bakhomba ukucwaninga okubonisa ukuthi isijeziso sangempela asiphumelelanga futhi sibeka izingane engozini emiphumeleni eminingi emibi, ucwaningo lubonisa ukuthi ukukhwabanisa kuqhutshwa emakhaya amaningi. Amaphesenti angu-83 aseMelika ajeziswe ngokomzimba ngabazali bawo ngebanga lesihlanu, ngokusho kukaLiz Gershoff, Ph.D.
, isazi sezengqondo esithuthukayo kanye noprofesa ohlangene eMnyangweni Wezokuthuthukiswa Kwabantu kanye NeSayensi Yomndeni eYunivesithi yaseTexas e-Austin.
Kodwa kunezibonakaliso ukuthi abaningi basuka ekujezisweni kwezingane, kusho uVictor Vieth, uMqondisi Omkhulu Emeritus e-Gundersen National Child Protection Training Centre, eWinona, eMN. "Kunesimo esicacile esivela ekujezisweni komuntu," kusho uVieth. "Imiphakathi eminingi enokholo isuka kuyo."
Kubazali abaningi, ukusebenzisa isijeziso semoto kubantwana babo kukhona okubheka njengesinqumo somuntu siqu. Babona njengethuluzi elibalulekile, eliphumelelayo, nelusizo ekufundiseni izingane ukuthi baziphathe kanjani, futhi abaningi abakholelwa ukuthi isijeziso somzimba kufanelekile bazizwe bezivikela lapho isijeziso somuntu sibhekwa njengento engasebenzi futhi engaba yingozi.
Kodwa kubazali ezingxenyeni zombili zempikiswano, ukubeka imizwelo eceleni-kanye nanoma yikuphi ukugxekwa noma ukwahlulela-futhi ukubheka ucwaningo mhlawumbe indlela engcono kakhulu.
"Kunesidingo sangempela kuleli zwe ukuxoxa ngokuphathelene nokujeziswa komuntu okungenangokomzwelo," kusho uVieth.
Okwenza Abazali Bathululele Izingane
Nazi ezinye zezimpikiswano ezenziwe yilabo abeseka isijeziso somuntu, futhi yiziphi izinkomba zokuqondisa izingane ezikushoyo:
1. Abazali bathola isijeziso ngokwabo futhi abaziboni kahle. Ukuchitha izingane nokusebenzisa ezinye izinhlobo zokujeziswa ngokomzimba kuyingozi, hhayi isiqinisekiso sokuthi izingane zizoletha izinkinga.
Kunembile kakhulu ukubuka isijeziso somuntu njengenkinga yokuphepha, kusho uDeborah Sendek, umqondisi weSikhungo Sokuqeqesha Ngokuphumelelayo, uhlelo lweGundersen National Protection Training Centre, olusebenza ekukhuthazeni ukuqeqeshwa okuphumelelayo kwezingane nokuqeda zonke izinkampani ukujeziswa kwezingane. Namuhla, senze izinguquko eziningi ukugcina izingane nabantu abadala bevikelekile. I-Sendek ithi, "Kukhona izinto eziningi ezenzeka eminyakeni engu-10 noma engu-20 edlule ukuthi asikwenzi namhlanje, njengokungasebenzisi izihlalo zemoto noma izigqoko zebhayisikili. Kodwa namhlanje, angifuni ukubeka ingane ngebhayisikili ngaphandle kwesigqoko. Senze izinguquko. "
I-Sendek iphakamisa ukuthi abazali ababethelwa njengezingane bangase bafune ukubheka kanzima okuhlangenwe nakho kwabo. "Zibuze ngobuqotho uma uzizwa sengathi uboshelwe nobaba noma umama wakho lapho ushaywa," kuphakamisa i-Sendek. "Ingabe bekuyizinto ezikufundisayo isifundo noma ngabe ingxoxo owaba nayo nabazali bakho nezinto owadingeka uyenze ukuze wenze ukuziphatha okubi?"
2. Iyindlela ephumelelayo yokuthola izingane zilalele. Ukuphambanisa kungamisa izingane ngalesi sikhathi kodwa ucwaningo lubonisa ukuthi ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, ubuhlungu nokwesaba kungavimbela izingane ukuba zifunde izifundo abazali abazama ukuzifundisa.
"Ukugxeka akufundisi izingane ukuba ziphathe ngendlela abazali abafuna ngayo, futhi zingaba nomthelela ohlukile," kusho uDkt. Gershoff. "Izingane ezishaywayo zivame ukuvumelana nazo ngokushesha, kodwa azifundiswanga ukuthi zingcono kanjani esikhathini eside." Ukushaya akubafundisi ukuthi kungani benza okwakungalungile noma lokho okufanele bakwenze ngesikhathi esizayo, kusho uDkt Gershoff. Ifundisa izingane ukuthi zingakugwema kanjani ukushaywa esikhundleni sokubasiza ukuba bathuthukise izisusa ezinhle zokuziphatha okuhle.
3. Ukwehlisa induku kuyalimaza ingane. Abanye abazali bakholelwa ngokuqinile ukuthi izingane ezingenaso iziphuzo ziyokhula zizophangwa . Kodwa ngokumane ubuke izigidi zezibonelo zezingane eziziphatha kahle, ezinomusa , ezinhle nezinhle kahle ezingakaze zihlongozwe zibonisa ukuthi lokhu akunjalo nje.
Nakuba ukwehluleka ukuyala izingane kungabangela ukuba izingane zibe nezidakamizwa futhi zingajabulisi, isijeziso-corporal noma enye-akuyona into ehlukile. Indlela engcono ukuthi uthathe indawo ephakathi, lapho kukhona inhlanganisela yesiyalo esiqinile nesothando ngaphandle kobuhlungu noma ukwesaba ukuphahlazeka.
Ngokuqondene nokuphikisana okungazange kusetshenziswe ukujeziswa komuntu kuyoholela ekuziphatheni okubi, Amanothi aphikisayo ukuthi abantu abasejele noma izingane abahlukumezayo kungenzeka ukuthi baphonswa kakhulu uma bengenabantwana abalalelayo noma abantu abadala abangekho ukwephula umthetho.
3. Akukho okunye okusebenzayo. "Akukho lutho olusebenza njalo," kusho i-Sendek. Ukushaya akusebenzi ngaso sonke isikhathi noma; uma kungenjalo, umzali kuzodingeka abuye aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde, amanothi uTomek. Ukubeletha kungokuvumelana, nokunikeza izingane imiphumela emihle, njengokuthatha i-TV, isikhathi sekhompyutheni, noma imidlalo yevidiyo ngesonto noma ukuba nezingane zenza imisebenzi eyengeziwe yokungaziphathi kahle noma ukuphula imithetho.
Uma ingane yakho inenkinga yokuziphatha noma yokufunda, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuthi ingabanjwa, kusho i-Sendek. "Ezinye izingane zithola ngaphezulu ngoba zinobudlova noma zinzima ukulawula ukuziphatha kwazo," kusho i-Sendek. "Kubaluleke nakakhulu ukuthi lezi zingane zikwazi ukuzilawula futhi zingafundi ukushaya uma kunenkinga." "Izingane ezinezinkinga zokuziphatha zingase zibe ngaphansi kwesikhumba sakho," kusho uVieth. "Kukhona izifundo ezikusho ukuthi zingase zishaywe."
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yikuphi ukuphikisana okukhona, funda ngezijeziso zomuntu kanye nemiphumela yayo ezinganeni, futhi ufunde ngalokho okushiwo ochwepheshe ukuthi yiziphi izizathu zokuthi kungani izingane zingasebenzi. Uma usebenzisa isijeziso somuntu, zibuze le mibuzo ebalulekile:
- Ingabe iphumelela?
- Ingabe iphumelela kakhulu kunezinye izindlela?
- Yimiphi imiphumela yesikhathi eside?
"Asisho ukuthi izingane azidingi ukuqeqeshwa, kusho uVieth." Kodwa kufanele kube isiqondiso esisebenzayo. "
> Imithombo:
> Gershoff, uLiz. Ingxoxo. Mashi 2014.
> Knox M. Ngokushaya izingane: Ukubuyekezwa kwesigwebo sokuboshwa e-United States. I-Journal Yokunakekelwa Kwezempilo Kwezingane . 2010; 24 (2): 103-107. i-doi: 10.1016 / j.pedhc.2009.03.001.
> Thumela, Deborah. Ingxoxo. Mashi, 2014.
> Vieth, uVictor. Ingxoxo. Mashi 2014.