Imikhuba yansuku zonke nemikhuba engasiza izingane ukuba zibe ngabantu abalungile
Abazali abaningi bagxila emabhalweni abantwana babo nasemisebenzini yangaphandle, njengokuqinisekisa ukuthi izingane zifundela, zenze umsebenzi wesikole, futhi zifike emisebenzini yokudlala ibhola noma imfundo yokudansa ehlelwe futhi ngesikhathi. Kodwa kaningi, sikhohlwa ukubeka isikhathi nokuzikhandla ekukhuliseni enye ingxenye yentuthuko yengane nentuthuko - okubaluleke kakhulu, futhi okubaluleke nakakhulu, kunamamaki amahle, imiklomelo, kanye nezintambo - ngokuba ngumuntu omuhle .
Ngamanje "mina, mina," futhi "nginakho manje" umphakathi, kungaba lula ukukhohlwa ukubaluleka kokuphikisana nale miyalezo egcwele yokuthokozisa okusheshayo, ukuthengwa komthengi nokuzidla. Uma sifuna ukukhulisa izingane ezinenkampani enhle nabantu abanomusa, singasiza ukuqondisa izingane zethu emikhondweni nasekuziphatheni okukhuthaza imikhuba emihle njengomusa, ukuphana, nozwela kulabo abancani kakhulu noma abadinga usizo.
Njengoba i-CS Lewis yakhuluma ngokudumile, "Ubuqotho benza into efanele, ngisho nalapho kungekho muntu obukayo." Singakhulisa kanjani ingane enhle, ozokwenza okulungile, ngisho noma kungekho muntu ongakubona enza, nalapho kungahle kube khona umvuzo? Nakuba kungekho ndlela eqinisekisiwe (uma nje!), Nansi ezinye izindlela abazali abangakha ngayo uhlamvu oluhle futhi basize ingane yabo ukuba ikhule ibe umuntu omuhle.
Indlela Ongayikhulisa Ngayo Izingane Zakho Ngakho Ziba Abantu Abalungile
- Ukukhulisa uzwela kumntanakho.
Uhlakaniphile ngokomzwelo nozwela , noma ikhono lokuzibeka ezicathulweni zomunye futhi ucabange imizwa nemicabango yabo, ingenye yezimfanelo eziyisisekelo kubantu abalungile. Ucwaningo luye lwabonisa ukuthi unomqondo ophakeme we-emotional quotient - okuwukuthi, ukwazi ukuqonda imizwa yakho kanye nemizwa yabanye nokuzithiba nokukwazi ukulawula imizwelo yomuntu siqu - kuyinto ebalulekile yokuphumelela empilweni. Ukukhuthaza uzwela kumntanakho, khuthaza ingane yakho ukuthi ikhulume ngemizwa yakhe futhi uqiniseke ukuthi uyazi ukuthi uyabakhathalela. Uma kungqubuzana kwenzeka nomngane, mbuze ukuba acabange ukuthi umngane wakhe angase abe nomuzwa kanjani futhi abonise izindlela zakhe zokuphatha imizwelo yakhe futhi asebenze kahle ngokuvumelana nesinqumo.
- Mkhuthaze ukuba aphakamise abanye abakuzungezile futhi angalokothi aqede umuntu.
Ngenkathi izindaba mayelana nezingane ezibandakanya ukuhlukumezeka nezinye izinto ezimbi zivame ukwenza izinhloko, iqiniso liwukuthi izingane eziningi zenza imisebenzi emihle ngokuthula ngezikhathi ezivamile zokuphila kwazo, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yenza umngane uzizwe kangcono uma ehle noma ephonsa emphakathini womphakathi . Njengoba ukhuthaza ukuziphatha okuhle okufana nokwenza okuthile okwenza usuku lomuntu lube ngcono (ngisho nento encane njengokubamba umngane ehlombe lapho ehlushwa), qiniseka ukuthi ukhuluma ngezinkinga ezimbi zokuziphatha noma ukuhlukunyezwa kunamacala omabili (kokubili labo abakhona, bathi, ukuxhashazwa nalabo abenza ukuhlukumezeka ), futhi kungani futhi kuba buhlungu kanjani abantu.
- Mfundise ukuba azitholele.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ingane yakho isiza umakhelwane osekhulile ngokugubha umgwaqo noma ikusiza ukupakisha izimpahla ezithile ezikhonjiwe emabhokisini okunikela ngemindeni yomndeni, isenzo sokuzithandela singabangela uhlamvu lomntanakho. Uma izingane zisiza abanye, zifunda ukucabanga ngezidingo zalabo abahluphekile kunabo, futhi zingaziqhenya ngokwabo ngokwenza umehluko empilweni yabanye. - Ungamvuza ngenxa yokuziphatha okuhle noma ukuziphatha okuhle.
Into ebalulekile okumele uyikhumbule lapho ukhuthaza izingane ukusiza abanye ukuthi ungabavuli ngazo zonke izenzo ezinhle. Ngaleyo ndlela, ingane yakho ngeke ihlanganise ukuzivotela ngokuzitholela izinto futhi izofunda ukuthi ukuzwa okuhle ngokusiza abanye kuyoba umvuzo. (Akusho ukuthi akufanele nakanjani uthathe ingane yakho ukuze uthole usizo oluthile noma umnike isipho sokusiza abanye futhi usebenze kanzima futhi ufunde kanzima; izingane ziyakhuthaza futhi ziphumelele ekuvumelaneni kwabazali. indlela yokumbonisa ukuthi uyabonga kanjani ngezinto ezinhle azenzayo.) - Fundisa imikhuba yakhe emihle.
Ngabe ingane yakho ijwayele ukwenza izinto eziyisisekelo zokuziphatha okuhle njengokuthi "Ngiyabonga" futhi "Ngiyacela"? Ingabe ukhuluma ngendlela ehloniphekile kubantu abadala nakwabadala njenge "Mnu" noNkk "? Ingabe uyakwazi ukubingelela abantu ngokufanele , futhi uyazi yini izinto eziyisisekelo zokuziphatha kahle kwetafula ? Ingabe ulahlekelwa umusa lapho edlala umdlalo nabangani? Khumbula ukuthi ukhulisa umuntu ozophuma emhlabeni futhi ahlanganyele nabanye impilo yakhe yonke. (Futhi lo muntu omncane, njengoba ekhula, uzobe etafuleni lokudla nawe futhi axoxisane nawe nsuku zonke aze aphume esidlekeni.) Ungadlala indima ebalulekile ekubunjeni ukuthi ingane yakho izolungiswa kanjani.
- Mphathe ngomusa nangenhlonipho.
Indlela ephumelela kakhulu yokuthola izingane ukuba zikhulume nawe nabanye ngendlela enenhlonipho futhi ukuxhumana nabanye ngendlela enhle ngokukwenza kahle lokho uma uxhumana nomntanakho. Cabanga ngokuthi ukhuluma kanjani nengane yakho. Ingabe ukhuluma kabi uma ungajabuli ngento ethile? Ingabe uke ukhale noma ukhulume izinto ezingehle? Cabanga ngendlela yakho yokukhuluma, ukuziphatha, ngisho nokucabanga, bese uzama ukukhetha ithoni enobungane nenhlonipho nengane yakho, ngisho noma ukhuluma naye ngephutha noma ukungalungi. - Ungabi namahloni ngokuyala ingane yakho.
Abazali abambelela ekunikezeni imingcele yezingane noma ngokuqinile (kodwa ngothando) ukulungisa ukuziphatha okubi kungase kube yingozi ukulimaza ingane yabo ngezinhloso ezinhle. Izingane ezingalahlwa ziyizinto ezingathandeki, zobugovu, futhi ngokumangalisayo, azijabuli. Ezinye zezizathu eziningi zokuthi kungani sidinga ukujezisa zihlanganisa iqiniso lokuthi izingane ezinikezwa imithetho ecacile, imingcele, kanye nokulindela zinomthwalo wemfanelo, ezanele ngokwanele, kungenzeka ukuthi zenze izinqumo ezinhle futhi zingase zenze abangane futhi zijabule . Uma nje ubona izinkinga zokuziphatha ezifana nokuqamba amanga noma ukubuyela emuva , ziphathwe ngothando, ukuqonda, nokuqina.
- Mfundise indlela yokubonga.
Ukufundisa ingane yakho indlela yokubonga nokubonisa ukuthi ukubonga kuyisici esibalulekile sokukhulisa ingane enhle. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kungokudla okulungiselelwe isidlo noma ngesipho sokuzalwa ku-Grandma noMkhulu, fundisa ingane yakho ukuthi ikubonge. Ngezinto ezifana nezipho zokuzalwa nezinsuku zamaholide, qiniseka ukuthi ingane yakho ingena kumkhuba wokubhala ngiyabonga amakhadi. - Mnike imithwalo yemfanelo emndenini.
Lapho izingane zinolwazi olulindelekile lwemisebenzi edingekayo yobudala okufanele luyenze ekhaya, njengokusiza ukusetha itafula noma ukujula phansi, bathola umqondo wemfanelo nokufeza. Ukwenza umsebenzi omuhle nokuzwa sengathi banomthelela omuhle wendlu kungenza izingane ziziqhenye ngokwazo, futhi zizisize zijabule. - Bonisa ukuziphatha okuhle.
Cabanga ngendlela oxhumana ngayo nabanye, ngisho nalapho ingane yakho ingaboni. Uthi "Ngiyabonga" kumabhalane wokuhlola emakethe? Ingabe uyaqeda ukuhleka ngamakhelwane noma abasebenza nabo? Ingabe usebenzisa ithoni enobungane lapho ukhuluma nabalindi? Akungasho ukuthi indlela oyithonya ngokuqondile ukuthi izingane zakho ziyoba kanjani. Uma ufuna ukukhulisa ingane enhle, ziphathe ngendlela ofuna ingane yakho ukuba yenze ngayo.