Indlela Yokukhuluma Ngama-Sexual Issues Ne-Safe Safe Ngakho-ke Intsha Yakho Iyalalela
Ngihlale ngicabanga ukuthi ngivulekile nezingane zami mayelana nezindaba zokuziphatha ngokocansi okunempilo kanye nobulili obuphephile. Kodwa-ke, lapho indodana yami ingicela ukuba ngimenzele ku-Planned Parenthood ngamakhondomu mahhala ngemva kokuzalwa kwakhe kwe-18, konke ukuvuleka kwami kwaphuma ngefasitela. Ngabuza uDuane Westhoff, i-HIV & STD Prevention Specialist yezeMpilo kanye nemfundo yabaNtshisekelo abasha / abasebasha (HEY), uhlelo lwe-ARK Program, ngeseluleko sakhe.
Ukukhuluma Ngezocansi Nezingane Zakho
U-Westhoff utshele ukuthi ingane yami incike kimi njengomzali wayo ngolwazi olubalulekile mayelana namagugu, uthando, nobuhlobo, hhayi nje ngezwi kodwa ngezenzo. Nazi iziphakamiso ezimbalwa azedlula ngazo ezingakusiza wena nabanye abazali abahlukumezayo ngokukhuluma ngocansi nabasha babo.
"Uma Ungeke Ukhulume Ngawo, Akufanele Uyenze"
Lokhu kuyimigomo emihle yesithupha kwabasha abasanda kusebenza ngokocansi. Ikhuthaza umthwalo wemfanelo wobulili nokuxhumana. Lesi seluleko sibonakala sisebenza kubazali abathintekayo ngokunikeza ikhondomu kubantfwana babo abasha. Khuluma nengane yakho mayelana nokukhathazeka kwakho. Yiba neqiniso mayelana nezinkinga zakho. Hlola bese wabelana kokubili imizwa yakho nezingane zakho. Xoxa nendodana yakho noma indodakazi yakho imiphumela emihle kanye nemiphumela emibi ukuthi ubulili bungaba nayo empilweni yethu.
Yazisa ukuthi Ukukhuluma Kunzima kodwa Kubalulekile
Kungaba yinselele ukuchaza ukukhathazeka kwakho.
Ungase uzizwe unamahloni. Kodwa lokhu kuyithuba elihle lokusebenza njengomlingisi wakho wezingane mayelana nokuxhumana okunempilo. Khombisa ingane yakho ukuthi uyatholakala ukuze uphendule noma yimuphi imibuzo abanayo. Uma benemibuzo, phendula ngaphandle kokwahlulela, ugxile emaqinisweni. Uma ngabe ingane yakho izwa ukuzikhathalela ngokuvulela kuwe, bayozama ukuthola ulwazi abayidingayo kwenye indawo ...
futhi kungenzeka ukuthi ayilungile.
Bonisa ukuthi unesithakazelo ngaphandle kokufuna imininingwane esondelene nayo
Khumbula ukuthi ingane yakho ingase ikhululeke ukukhuluma nawe ngezocansi. Kungenzeka ukuthi bavikela ubumfihlo babo, futhi bangase babe nomuzwa wokuthi kakade banamaqiniso amaningi abawadingayo mayelana nobulili nokukhulelwa. Kodwa bafuna ukuthi abazali babo bahlanganyele empilweni yabo. Sebenzisa ngokunenzuzo amathuba emvelo okukhuluma. Ngesikhathi esilandelayo uma udlula emtholampilo, uphinde ukhulise isihloko.
Phinda ubuyelele ukubaluleka kocansi oluvikelekile
Ukuxoxa nomntanakho ukuthi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi yisikhathi esifanele yini sokuhlanganyela ocansini kubalulekile. Intsha idinga ukwazi ukuthi ubulili ngeke buphulukise ubudlelwane obunzima. Ubulili abukho ubufakazi bokuthi ukhulile. Ubulili buhambisana nemithwalo yemfanelo emikhulu. Ingabe ingane yakho isilungele yona?
Uma lezi zingukukhathazeka kwakho, wabelane ngazo nentsha yakho. Dlulisa lokho, ngenkathi ufuna ukuthi uphephile, uthemba ukuthi ulala ocansini ngezizathu ezinhle.
Kumele ugcizelele ukuthi, ngaphandle kokuziqeda, amakhondomu yiyona ndlela kuphela yokuvimbela ukukhulelwa okunikeza ukuvikeleka okuthembekile ezifweni ezithathelwana ngocansi.
Futhi ungakhohlwa ukuthi angakwazi futhi ukuthenga amakhondomu akhe. Kufanele sikhuthaze intsha futhi sikhumbuze ukuthi ucansi lithwala imithwalo yemfanelo.
Uma enamahloni kakhulu ukuthenga amakhondomu noma ukuthola ikhondomu yamahhala, kungase kube isibonakaliso sokuthi akakulungeli ngempela imithwalo yemfanelo yesondo.
Khumbuza ingane yakho yale nugget yokuqala iseluleko: "Uma ungakwazi ukukhuluma ngakho, akufanele ukwenze."