Ukusiza ingane yakho esemncane ukuba iqiniseke kungaba yinkinga. Izwe liye lahamba ngokushesha kakhulu futhi lincintisana. Abantu abadala, ikakhulukazi abasha abancane, bangase bakhathazeke ngokuthi abavumelani nontanga yabo, futhi besabe ukuphuma endaweni yabo yokududuza . Ukwesaba ukuhluleka kungadala amandla futhi kubangele ukuthi abantu abadala abashaye amathuba.
Kodwa kuthiwani uma ukwehluleka kungabonakali njengento embi?
Ukuhlenga kabusha ukuhluleka
URyan Babineaux noJohn Krumboltz, izazi zengqondo kanye nabacebisi bezemisebenzi, babhala incwadi ethi Fail Fast, Fail Often, okuchaza ukuthi kungani ukwehluleka kungaba empeleni kumuntu. Ngokuzama izinto ezintsha nokuhluleka, abadala asebekhulile bafunda amakhono okuphila abasiza ekugcineni baphumelele futhi bahole ukuphila okujabulisayo.
Ukuhlenga ukuhluleka kuyindlela ebalulekile abazali abazosiza izingane zabo ezincane ezindala ukuba zizethembe futhi zizethembe. Esikhundleni sokubheka ukuhluleka njengento engalungile, siza abantu bakho abasha bacabange njengelithuba. Bakhuthaze ukuba baphuphe amaphupho abo, ngisho nalabo abonakala bengenakufinyelela. Khumbuza ukuthi ngenxa yokuthi uhluleka okuthile okuthile izikhathi ezimbalwa akusho ukuthi ngeke uphumelele. Ngisho ne-batter engcono kakhulu e-baseball iphuma ngezinye izikhathi, kodwa-ke iphinda ivuke futhi ngethemba ukuthi inomphumela ohlukile.
Khohlwa Ukuba Uphelele
Encwadini yabo, i-Babineaux ne-Krumboltz baxoxisana ngokuthi abantu bangakwazi kanjani ukulungiswa kokungalungile empilweni yabo.
Abalobi baveza lo mqondo njengombono "ongakabi". Ukubuka okwamanje kungabangela ukuthi abantu banamathele ezimweni ngoba babona izithiyo eziningi kakhulu zokuqhubeka phambili.
Isibonelo, umuntu angase azizwe, "Angikwazi ukufaka isicelo 'kodwa' ngoba ngidinga ukulinda umnotho ukuze uthuthuke."
U-Amy Alpert, umqeqeshi wokuphila, uthi lesi sifiso sokuba siphelele noma sisebenze kuphela esimweni esiphelele yimizwa evamile phakathi kwamakhasimende akhe omdala omdala.
U-Alpert uyachaza, "Ukuzama ukuphelela kuyisithiyo esikhulu. Isibonelo, ngaphambi kokufaka isicelo somsebenzi, bangase bakhathazeke ngokweqile ngokuqinisekisa ukuthi i-resume yabo iphelele ngaphambi kokuthumela. Kodwa ukuyibuyekeza ngokuphindaphindiwe akusiyona ikhambi elihle kakhulu. Ukuze uthole umsebenzi, udinga ukufaka isicelo. Ngakho-ke, becabanga ukuthi basebenze ekuqhubeni kabusha, bekungcono kakhulu ukuyithumela nje kunokuqhubeka nokuzama ukuyenza iphelele. "
Ungadluli izimo
Ngokusho kwencwadi ethi Ikhodi Yokuthembela nguKatty Kay noClaire Shipman, abesifazane abasebasha abadala bayathandana futhi bakhathazeke ngaphezu kwontanga yabo. U-Alpert uyavuma futhi uthi, "Ngithola amakhasimende amaningi amancane amantombazane esaba ukufaka isicelo somsebenzi noma umsebenzi wokufundela izifundo uma bengayitholi yonke imingcele yezidingo ezibhalwe ohlwini. Ngokuphambene nalokho, insizwa inamathuba amaningi okuya kuwo futhi angakhathazeki kakhulu ngokuba ngumuntu ophelele esikhundleni sakhe. "
Ebusweni, ukucabanga ngokweqile kungase kungabonakali njengesici esibi. Phela, intsha kanye nabantu abadala bayayaziwa ngokuzikhukhumeza futhi lokhu kungaholela ekuziphatheni okuyingozi. Kodwa kukhona umehluko omkhulu phakathi kokucabangisisa ngezinto nokucubungula. U-Alpert uyachaza, "Angikukhuthazi ukuthatha ingozi engadingekile kodwa kunokuba ngikhuthaze owesifazane osemusha ukuba angasichitha isikhathi esivumayo.
Yenza isinqumo futhi uqhubeke phambili. Uma kuyisinqumo esingalungile, funda kuyo futhi uqhubeke. "
Qondisisa Isenzo Leso Sikhombisa Ekukholweni
Abazali bangakhohliswa ekucabangeni ukuthi banganikeza ingane yabo emdala ukuzethemba ngokubavikela ekudumeni. Ukuqiniseka kwangempela kuvela ekuqapheliseni ukuthi ungakwazi ukubuyisela emuva ekubuyiseleni noma ukwehluleka.
Abantu abadala bakuthola ukuzethemba ngokwenza kwabo. Umshayeli osanda kulayiseniswa angase angabi nokuzethemba izikhathi ezimbalwa zokuqala lapho eqhuba khona emgwaqeni omkhulu. Umzali uthi, "Ungumshayeli omuhle" ngeke ukhulise ukuzethemba kwakhe njengoba nje umshayeli empeleni ephuma lapho futhi eqhuba.
Umzali uthi kumshayeli omusha, "Ngikhathazekile kakhulu lapho usendleleni, angikwazi ukulala" kuzonciphisa ukuzethemba kwakhe. Zama ukukhuthaza. Ungadluli ukwesaba komuntu siqu nokungaqiniseki. Esikhundleni salokho, abazali kufanele bazame ukubeka isibonelo kubantwana babo abasebekhulile ngokuphuma endaweni yabo yokududuza bese bezama izinto ezintsha ngokwabo.