Ngaphandle Kokuzwela
Wonke umzali ufanelwe udumo uma esebenza kanzima ezinganeni zabo. Wonke umzali udinga usizo njalo. Wonke umzali udinga isikhathi sakhe.
Ngakho yini eyenza abazali babe nezidingo ezikhethekile izingane kangaka ... ezikhethekile? Yini abayidingayo ukuthi abanye abazali abakwenzi? Abantu bangabasiza kanjani abazali abadingayo ukuze bathole okudingayo?
Izinto Ezidingekayo Ezikhethekile Abazali Abadinga
Nasi uhlu oluthile olungahle luzwakale lujwayele kumama nabesilisa ababhekana nezinkinga zokuphila kanye nengane yokuphila nengane, okungakhathaliseki ukuthi yiyiphi isizathu, ithathwa ngokuthi "ikhethekile." Ngenkathi lezi ziyi-11 eziphezulu, azikho e-oda elithile.
1. Isikhathi
Phakathi kwemihlangano ye-PTO kanye nezinsuku zokuyeka ukusebenza, kungaba nzima kunoma yimuphi umzali ukuthola isikhathi "sami". Qinisekisa ukuthi izikhathi ezingu-10 zabazali bezingane ezinesidingo esikhethekile okumele futhi zengeze imihlangano ye- IEP , ukuqokwa kwezokwelapha, kanye nokuvakashelwa odokotela abaningi ekuhlanganiseni. Engeza izinselele ezifana nokushayela ngamamayela angu-50 ukuze ufike kumuntu wamazinyo kuphela ozosebenza nomntanakho, kuphela ukuthi ufunde ukuthi uzodinga ukubuya ngesonto elizayo ukuze ugcwalise leyo ndawo ... bese ushayela ngamamayela angu-60 ngenye indlela ingane yakho ifuna ukuthatha i-ballet futhi kunezidingo ezikhethekile zezigaba ze-ballet ngaphesheya kwesifunda. Futhi masingaqali ngesikhathi sakho, umlingani wakho, ezinye izingane zakho, umndeni wakho onwetshiwe.
2. Amandla
Akukona nje ukuthi kudla isikhathi sokuba ngumzali okhethekile, kuyakhathaza. Engeza wonke amandla adingekayo okukhulisa ingane evamile, bese ufaka amahora ngosuku ukushayela ekuqokweni kwamadolobha, ukugcwalisa amaphepha, ukwenza ucwaningo oluthe xaxa, ukulawula ukuqubuka komntanakho, ukupheka ukudla okukhethekile kumntanakho ngenxa yokwelashwa, ukungabekezelelani , noma izinkinga zokudla.
Konke kuhlanganisa amahora ambalwa kakhulu phakathi kwamashidi.
3. Imali
Abazali ababili abasebenza isikhathi esigcwele kufanele, ezimweni eziningi, bakwazi ukuthola imali eyanele yomndeni ukuze baphile ngokunethezeka. Kodwa uma ungumzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile ukwanda kwezindleko. Imishini ekhethekile, imithi, abahlinzeki, igesi engeziwe-konke kuhlanganisa.
Futhi omama abaningi bezingane ezinesidingo esikhethekile bavusa umoya wokunciphisa umsebenzi wabo wokuthola ingane yabo, ngaleyo ndlela banciphise imali yabo uma beyidinga kakhulu.
4. Ubuhlobo Ovamile
Uma ungumzali wezingane ezidinga izidingo ezikhethekile, kubonakala sengathi konke ukusebenzisana ngaphandle komsebenzi kubandakanya ezinye izici ezidinga izidingo ezikhethekile zokubeletha. Ngisho nemibuthano yakho yezenhlalakahle ivuselela kubandakanya ikakhulukazi abazali bezinye izingane ezidinga izidingo ezikhethekile, nezingxoxo zigxile "kumculi owedlula zonke we-x" noma "ukuthi uthisha wendawo yesikhungo ubolile kanjani." Kodwa njengabo bonke abanye, abazali bezingane ezinesidingo esikhethekile bafuna ukuxhumana okuvamile, okuvamile kwabantu. Ubhiya nabangani. Umdlalo we-baseball. Isikhathi sokuhlehlisa emuva nabangani nomndeni ngaphandle kokubhekisela egameni elithi "okhethekile."
5. I-Sitter for Usuku Lusuku
Abazali bezingane ezivamile baqasha isitifiketi bese baphuma kusihlwa. Abazali abanezidingo ezikhethekile izingane, akulula ngaso sonke isikhathi lokho. Ezinye izidingo ezikhethekile zidinga abahleli bekhono ngamakhono akhethekile angabuka ekuqeqeshweni kwezokwelapha kuya kobuchwepheshe be-autism. Akukhona nje kuphela ukuthi abahleli abanjalo bakuthola kunzima ukuthola, kepha (ngokwemvelo) bahlawula kabili noma kathathu izinga lokuhamba.
6. Ukuqinisekiswa
Uma ingane yakho inesidingo esikhethekile, kungenzeka ukuthi uchithe isikhathi esingenangqondo sokukhathazeka ngokuthi ngabe ngandlela-thile ubangele izinkinga zakhe, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ukhethe ukhetho olufanele lwezokwelapha noma zokwelapha, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi wenza okwanele (noma okuningi) ukuthuthukisa amathuba akhe ekuphileni.
Nakuba kungekho muntu ongakutshela ukuthi ikusasa lizoletha yini, okudinga kakhulu abazali badinga indlebe yokulalela kanye nempendulo enhle uma besaba mayelana nokukhetha kwabo nokuthi yini ikusasa elizoyiletha.
7. Indawo yokuvotela
Umlingani wakho uzwile konke izikhathi ezingu-50. Abazali bakho baye bakuzwa noma abanandaba. Abangani bakho abanandaba nokuzwa mayelana nomhlangano wakho we-IEP ophazamisayo wakamuva, futhi abasebenza nabo. Awukwazi ukufika ezinganeni zakho. Ngakho ngubani osele? Ngokubambelela, abazali abanezidingo ezikhethekile izingane zingenza izinto zibe zimbi nakakhulu, kodwa yiziphi izinketho zabo?
8. Ukuzivocavoca
Lokhu kungase kuzwakale njengenkinga encane, kodwa kubazali abaningi abadinga izingane ezikhethekile, kukhona nje amahora anganele ngosuku lokuzivocavoca.
Ukuzivocavoca, kubantu abaningi, ukucindezeleka okukhulu okukhululekayo. Kungaba futhi ithuba lokuxhumana nabangani. Ngokubaluleke kakhulu, ukungabi nokuzivocavoca kungaholela ezindabeni zezempilo ezibucayi.
9. Abomndeni Nabangani Ngencazelo
Kuyamangalisa ukuthi kaningi kangakanani umkhaya nabangane abanenhloso enhle bekhathazeka futhi bephuze lapho bevezwa nengane enezidingo ezikhethekile ezibucayi. I-autistic ingane ayifuni ukudlala ibhola lezinyawo, noma ingane enezinselelo ezinengqondo ibeka izandla zakhe ezindlebeni zakhe, futhi wonke umuntu ekamelweni ubonakala ephendula ngokumangalelwa kwecala. Ngenkathi ingane ngokwayo ingase ingakwazi ukubona amashiya aphakanyisiwe futhi ihanjiswe, abazali ngokuqinisekile bayabonakala. Futhi nakuba kunzima ukubhekana nezigwebo ezivela kubantu abangabazi, kunzima kakhulu ukuvumela izahlulelo zabangani abasondelene nabo.
10. Ulwazi
Izikole, odokotela, abahlengikazi, nama-ejensi bahlelwe ukusiza imindeni isekele izingane zabo ngezidingo ezikhethekile. Kungani-ke ukuthi akekho kulezi zinhlangano obonakala ezimisele ukutshela imindeni ukuthi iyini, yini abakufanele, nokuthi bangathola kanjani lokho abayidingayo?
Abazali abaningi abanezidingo ezikhethekile izingane zizokutshela ukuthi usuvele udinga ukwazi imithetho ekhethekile yezidingo, uqonde ukungena kanye nokuphuma kwezinhlangano nezinqubomgomo, futhi uqondisise ngokugcwele zonke izindlela zokwelapha ezitholakalayo ngaphambi kokuba uthathe izinyawo emhlanganweni wokuhlela wengane yakho. Ngokuvamile, abazali bayazi ngaphezu kwalabo ababizwa ngokuthi ochwepheshe lapho behamba emnyango, okusho ukuthi umama nobaba banesilinganiso seminyaka eminingana yokuqeqeshwa kweyunivesithi ngenxa yokushona kwabo ebusuku ngaphambi komshini.
11. Umqeqeshi
Akekho kithi ohamba ngokuphila okungaphezu kwesisodwa, ngakho-ke sonke siyazi uma kuziwa ekuzalaneni. Kodwa kunabantu abenza umsebenzi wokusiza abazali bezingane ezinesidingo esikhethekile ukuthi bahambe ngezinketho kanye nemigodi. Abazali abaningi bangajabula kakhulu ngokuthola usizo lomqeqeshi onjalo ongabatshela ukuthi "bacele lokhu, hhayi lokho," noma "gcwalisa leli fomu futhi uzokwazi ukuthola izinsizakalo ezingcono kumntanakho."
Indlela Yokusiza Umzali Wengane Ehlangabezana Nezidingo Ezikhethekile
Uma ungumngane, umntanakho, umama, noma ubaba womzali wengane enezidingo ezikhethekile ungase uzibuze "Ngingenzenjani ukusiza?" Izindaba ezinhle ukuthi, kunezindlela eziningi ongenza umehluko ngaphandle kokushintsha impilo yakho noma ukuzilimaza wena nomndeni wakho. Nazi ezinye iziphakamiso:
Nikela kubantwana. Uma kungaphakathi kwenduduzo yakho kanye nekhono lakho, nikeza abangani bakho ikhefu ngokubheka izingane zabo ezidinga ihora ngehora, kusihlwa noma ngisho nangezimpelasonto. Lokhu kubizwa ngokuthi ukunakekelwa ukuhlonipha, futhi kuyisipho esingavamile.
Thatha ithebhu. Imali mhlawumbe ingumqondo omubi ngezizathu eziningi, kodwa uma ungakujabulela ukuthatha ithebhu ngesidlo sasemini, ubhiya, noma ngisho nokudla ukudla.
Nika izingane zakubo ukwelashwa okhethekile. Abantu abaningi abanezidingo ezikhethekile izingane zivame ukuthuthukisa izingane ezidinga ukunakekelwa. Uma unakho, cabanga ukuthatha izingane zakubo izidingo ezikhethekile ezinganeni ukuze uthole ukwelapha, noma ngisho nokuzihambisa ezenzweni zabo zezemidlalo nokuzijabulisa. Kuyindlela enhle yokwakha ubuhlobo ngenkathi inikeza umama nobaba isikhathi esincane kubo.
Thola inkomba. Ungabi lolo dade, umzala noma umzali obuka ngokungenalutho ingane enezidingo ezikhethekile futhi uzibuze ukuthi ungazibandakanya kanjani nabo. Esikhundleni salokho, funda incwadi, ubuke ividiyo, ufunde ekilasini, noma ubuze imibuzo ukuze ukwazi ukungena ngaphakathi ngesikhathi semicimbi yomndeni.
Lalela . Ngeke kukukhokhele i-nickel ukuba ibe indlebe yokulalela kanye nehlombe ukukhala.
Thatha ukuhamba . Nika umzali izidingo ezikhethekile ingane ithuba lokuba ngaphandle emoyeni omusha futhi uthole umzimba omncane nomngane noma othandekayo.
Yisekela futhi uhle. Kulula kakhulu ukungena enkulumweni engalungile uma uxoxa ngengane enezidingo ezikhethekile. Esikhundleni sokukhuphuka phansi, kunjalo, yenza konke okusemandleni akho ukugxilisa okuhle. Tshela umngane wakho noma othandekayo ukuthi wenza umsebenzi omuhle, futhi ukhombe eminye yemiphumela emihle ngempela abayibona ngokuqinisekile.
Gwema ukuzwela. Nakuba ngezinye izikhathi kunzima ukucabanga ngezinselelo zezidingo ezikhethekile zokubeletha, ukuhawukela akusizi. Empeleni, isihawu singagcizelela ukukhathazeka nemizwa yokuzihlukanisa. Gwema.
Setha isibonelo sokufakwa. Bonisa abanye ukuthi ukufakelwa kwenziwa kanjani ngokuthola izindlela zokufaka ingane izidingo ezikhethekile zomntanakho ngemisebenzi ejwayelekile. Uma udinga ukubhekana nezinselelo. Isibonelo, uma ingane enezidingo ezikhethekile inzima kakhuphukela phezulu kwesilayidi, mnike isandla. Uma engakwazi ukupompa i-swing, mnike i-push. Uma engaziqondi ngempela imithetho yomdlalo, yenza lula umdlalo. Akunzima njengoba kubonakala!
> Imithombo:
> Diament, uMichelle. Ama-autism anesimo sokucindezeleka afana nokulwa namasosha. I-DisabilityScoop, ngoNovemba 10, 2009.
> Minnes, P., Perry, A., & Weiss, JA (2015). Ababikezeli bokucindezeleka nenhlalakahle kubazali bezingane ezincane ezinokulibaziseka kokuthuthukiswa nokukhubazeka: ukubaluleka kombono womzali. I-Journal ye-Intellectual Disability Research , 59 (6), 551-560.
> Ohlobo, JW, & Hillman, SB (2014). Ukucindezeleka nokuqina kubazali bezingane ezinokukhubazeka kwengqondo nokuthuthukiswa: Ukubuyekezwa kwezici eziyinhloko nezincomo kubadobi. Umbhalo Wezinqubomgomo Nokuzikhandla Ngokukhubazeka Kwengqondo , 11 (2), 92-98.