Kuyinto ephawulekayo yokunakekelwa kwezingane zokubeletha ukuthi izingane eziningi engizikhathalelayo zizalwa zigula kakhulu noma zisheshe zisinde. Ngenhlanhla, ukushona kwengane akuvamile, kodwa lokho akukwenze kube lula ukuthwala lapho ingane ifa.
Uma ungumzali wengane eshonile, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ingane yakho yafa ngenxa yezinkinga zokuqala kokuqala noma ngenxa yenye imbangela, inhliziyo yami iphuma kuwe.
Ukudabuka kokufa kwengane kuyinkimbinkimbi enkulu, ebuhlungu. Nakuba lezi zindlela zokubhekana nazo ngeke zisuse usizi lwakho, ngithemba ukuthi zizokwenza kube lula ukuthwala.
Ukudabuka Ukufa Kwezingane
Uma ingane yakho ingakapheli, kungenzeka ukuthi usizi lwakho lwaqala isikhathi eside ngaphambi kokuba ingane yakho ishone. Kungenzeka usukulangazelela ukukhombisa isisu esikhulu ebantwaneni bakho, ukubamba umntwana wakho osanda kuzalwa, ukumduduza ngeseshini somhlengikazi eside. Ukufa kwengane ngaphambi kwesikhathi kuyandisa insizi yakho ngokucacile. Kungokwemvelo ukuzwa sengathi usizi lwakho lunzima kakhulu, noma ukuthi ngeke uphinde uzizwe ujwayelekile.
Kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi wonke umuntu uyabuhlungu ngendlela ehlukile nokuthi akukho ndlela efanele noma engalungile yokulila. Kunezinyathelo ezinhlanu zokucindezeleka abazali abaningi abazobhekana nazo ngokuphika, intukuthelo, ukuxoxisana, ukucindezeleka, nokwamukelwa. Kodwa lezi zikude kakhulu nemizwa abazali ababhekana nayo ngemva kokufa kwengane.
Ungase uzizwe:
- Ulahlwe
- Awunamandla
- Ukukhathazeka
- Ukugula ngokomzimba noma ukugula
- Uphelelwe amandla
- Njengokuphila kulahlekelwe incazelo
- Njengowe ngeke uqhubeke
- Ukukhulula ukuthi umzabalazo wengane yakho usuphelile
- Noma iyiphi inombolo yeminye imizwa
Ngemuva kokushona kwengane, kuvamile ukuzwa sengathi usizi lwakho lunzima kakhulu kangangokuthi awukwazi ukusinda.
Kodwa-ke, uma uzithola uzenza izinhlelo zokuzibulala, sicela ucele usizo olusheshayo. Uma uzithola uzenza izinhlelo zokuzibulala, kunezinombolo eziningi zokuzibulala noma abanye abantu ongabashayela ukuthi bazokusiza ngezikhathi zenkinga ebuhlungu bakho.
Ukubhekana Nokudabuka Kwakho
Nakuba akukho okuzokwenza ingane yakho ethandekayo ibuyele kuwe, kunezinyathelo zokubhekana ezingenza kube nzima ukubeletha ingane yakho. Njengoba nje usizi luhluke kubantu abahlukene, ukubhekana nosizi kungase kuhluke kakhulu komzali omunye komunye. Ngisho naphakathi kwabazali bomntwana ofanayo, lokho okusiza ukunciphisa usizi lomzali oyedwa kungase kungabi nhlobo kusiza komunye. Sebenzisa izindlela zokubhekana nazo ezikusiza ukuba uphulukise, kodwa wazi ukuthi kulungile ukushiya konke okulandelayo.
- Hlala Useduze Nomntwana Wakho: Ukuchitha isikhathi eduze nendawo obeke kuyo ingane yakho ukuphumula kungakusiza uzizwe usondelene naye futhi ukhumbule ingane yakho. Ukuchitha isikhathi nomzimba wengane yakho emva kokufa kungasiza ekuhlukaniseni ukuhlukaniswa ngokomzimba futhi kukuvumela ukuthi uhlehle.
- Hlala eduze nohlelo lwakho lokusekela : Abangane namalungu omndeni banikeza umthombo omuhle wamandla nokusekelwa kwabazali abaningi abafelwe. Ukukhuluma nabangani nomndeni kungagcina imizwa yakho njengoba wenza izinqumo ezinzima mayelana nokuphela kokunakekelwa kokuphila nokulungiswa komngane wakho. Kwabanye abazali, kumuntu noma kumaqembu asekelayo ekusizeni ekusizeni asetshenziswa kakhulu.
- Gcina iMemori Yakho Yengane Ephilayo: Abazali abaningi abafelwa ingane yabo babika ukuthi imimoto yezingane ezibaluleke kakhulu kubo. Bamba ngokuqinile ezithombeni, izinwele zezinwele, izinyawo zezinyawo, nanoma yiziphi ezinye izikhumbuzo zomzimba wengane yakho. Ukudala isikhumbuzo somntanakho, njengomuthi osanda kuhlwanyelwa, kungakusiza ukuba ugcine inkumbulo yakhe iphila, njengoba ingakwazi ukuhlonipha ingane yakho ngemikhombandlela ngokukhanyisa ikhandlela noma ukukhulula amabhaluni.
- Bheka Ukholo Lwakho: Imindeni enokholo oluqinile ibika ukuthi inkolelo yabo kuNkulunkulu yabasiza ukuba babhekane nokufa kwengane yabo. Abazali abaningi abathembela okholweni lwabo noma ababuyela ezinkolelweni ezingokwenkolo okungenzeka ukuthi baqale ukushiya, babike ukuthi ukholo lwabo lwabasiza ukuba bathole incazelo empilweni encane yengane yabo.
- Cabanga nge-Altruism: Ukubuyisela emphakathini kungasiza abazali abaningi ukuba babhekane nokufa kwengane yabo. Uma ubuye ubetha ubisi lwebele, cabanga ukunikela ubisi lwakho ebhange lebisi ukuze usize ezinye izingane ezigulayo ngaphambi kwesikhathi. Ukuzithandela esibhedlela lapho ingane yakho ishona khona kungakusiza uzizwe uxhumekile esibhedlela nasaneni yakho, futhi ukuhlanganyela emaqenjini okusekela kungakuvumela ukuba usize ezinye imindeni ezibhekana nokulahlekelwa.
Ukuphulukisa nokuhamba ngaphandle kokukhohlwa
Uma ingane yakho ifa, ungase uzizwe sengathi impilo ngeke iphinde izwe futhi evamile noma sengathi usizi lwakho ngeke luphele. Kodwa ekugcineni, uzoqala ukuzwa sengathi usizi alubuhlungu kakhulu futhi uqala ukuthola injabulo empilweni yakho futhi. Nakuba ingane yakho ihlale iyingxenye yakho futhi ungase uhlale uzwa usizi ngenxa yokufa kwengane yakho, uqala ukuphulukisa.
Imithombo
Brosig, CL, Pierucci, RL, Kupst, MJ & Leuthner, SR. "Ukunakekelwa Kokuphila Kwezingane Ezinganeni: I-Perspective's Perspective" Journal of Perinatology (2007) 27: 510-516.
I-Capitulo, K. "Ubufakazi bokungenelela kokuphulukiswa nokudilizwa kwe-Perinatal" I-American Journal ye-Nursing Child Nursing Nov / Dec 2005. 30: 389-396.
UDavis, D. noStein, M. Ukubeletha Ingane Yakho Yokuqala Nengane: I- Fulcrum Ye- Emotional Journey ; Golden, Colorado, 2004.