Akuvamile ukuthi izingane zilume, futhi kaningi nje yindlela abaveza ukukhungatheka ngayo ukuthi akakwazi ukuveza amagama. Noma kunjalo, ngezinye izikhathi kuba yinkinga enkulu. Yini engenzeka uma ukukhala kungakhulumi futhi yini ongayenza ukuze uyimise?
Ake sibheke ukubamba ezincane, ezinye zezizathu ezenza kwenzeke noma ziphikelela, yiziphi izinyathelo ongazithatha ukuze unciphise ukushaya, nokuthi ungayisingatha kanjani uma kwenzeka.
Ukubamba kuzingane
Ukubheja kuvamile kubantwana abancane futhi, kusukela ekubonweni kwengqondo, kubhekwa "okujwayelekile" kule nkathi yobudala. Kulinganiselwa ukuthi phakathi kwengxenye yesithathu nengxenye yazo zonke izingane ezisencane ekunakekelweni kwezinsuku kuzolunywa ngesikhathi esithile. Ukubheka ezincane kungaba yindlela abantwana abonisa ukukhungatheka noma isidingo sokunakwa ngaphambi kokuthi babe nezinye izindlela zokwenza kanjalo (njengokukhuluma.)
Lapho izinsana ziluma, kuthukuthelisa bonke ababandakanyekayo-abazali, abanakekeli kanye nezingane. Ngesikhathi ukuluma kuvamile ezinganeni ezincane, intsha encane eyaluma iyoma ngemva kokulungiswa izikhathi ezimbalwa. Kodwa-ke, kukhona izingane ezincane ezizoqhubeka ziluma naphezu kwemizamo yokulungisa ukuziphatha.
Ezinye izingane zifunda ukuluma ngokubuka ezinye zihamba ngendlela ngokukhala. Ngezinye izikhathi ukukhala kungaba ukuzivikela. Izingane ezincane zilawule ukulawula , futhi ukukhala kungase kube impendulo ekugqibeleni. Ukubamba okuphindaphindiwe kubantwana abancane kungase kube ukuziphatha okucabangayo njengoba izinsana ngokuvamile zikhetha ukunakwa okungakahleleki.
Ukuxhumeka Phakathi Kwabancane Ukunciphisa Ukukhokha Nokukhuluma
Izingane ezinokubambezeleka kwenkulumo nezilimi azikwazi ukuziveza kwezinye izingane noma kubantu abadala. Abantfwana abaningi abancane banenkinga yokuqonda lokho abanye abakushoyo kubo. Lokhu kunzima ukukhuluma kuphazamisa inkulumo iphuze izingane futhi ingabangela ukuba balume abanye ngokuphendula.
Inkulumo kanye nezingane ezisalindelekile izingane zingase zisebenzise ukuzama ukulawula ukuxhumana kwazo nabanye emvelweni wabo. Kuzingane ezinenkinga yokukhuluma, ukukhala kungathi, "Yeka ukungikhathaza. Ngidlala nalokhu."
Izindlela Zokuvimbela Ukubheka Futhi Ufundisa Ukuthwala Okuthintekayo:
Uma kuziwa ekubambeni ezincane, i-ounce yokuvimbela impela ibaluleke kakhulu isisindo somuthi wesilonda. Kukhona izinto eziningi ongayenza ukuze unciphise amathuba okuthi ingane yakho encane izoluma. Njengoba ubheka ngalezi zindlela zokuvimbela, sicela ungazizwa ukwahlulelwa njengomzali. Nakuba kunezinto eziningana ongayenza ukuze unciphise ukushaya, ezinye izingane ezisencane zizohlala ziluma naphezu kokuba nabazali abanothando kakhulu nabanakekelayo. Ukuze unciphise noma uvimbele ukushaya, nansi amathiphu ambalwa:
- Bheka izingane ezisemuva ekukhulumeni nasekuthuthukiseni ulimi ukuhlolwa nokuhlolwa kokukhubazeka kokufunda . Ukwelashwa kwenkulumo kungasiza ngokulibaziseka kwenkulumo ukunciphisa ukushaya nokunye ukuziphatha kwezinkinga.
- Hlola eduze izintana. Abantu abadala kufanele bajikeleze phakathi kwezingane ekunakekelweni kwelanga kunokuba babheke kude. Uma ungaphakathi kwemisebenzi yabantwana beselula, ungase futhi ubone amathuba okuziphatha nokuzizwa okungabangela ukushaya.
- Qaphela ukungavumelani futhi ungenele ngaphambi kokushaya. Ngezinye izikhathi kungase kube umqondo omuhle ukuvumela izingane "zizisebenzele wona" kodwa ngezikhathi ezithile zidinga umuntu omdala ukuthi angene futhi angenele.
- Khombisa ulimi olufanele lwazo zonke izingane ezisencane ekilasini noma ekhaya. Lokhu kubasiza bafunde izindlela ezifanele zokubhekana nokukhungatheka. Ukulinganisa ulimi kungasiza izingane ukuba zithuthukise amakhono okuxhumana ukuze adlale ngokufanele.
- Iba nesineke. Ukuthuthukiswa kwamakhono olimi kuthatha isikhathi. Abantfwana bangadinga izinyanga eziningana zokungenelela nokuhlelwa kabusha ukuze bafunde amakhono amasha okukhuluma kanye nokuziphatha okufanele.
- Hambisa izintana ezikhungathekile kwenye indawo yokudlala noma ubasize bakhethe ithoyizi noma umsebenzi ohlukile uma izingxabano ziqhuma. Sebenzisa isikhathi sokuphuma uma kudingeka.
- Gcina izindawo zokudlala ngokuhlelekile futhi unamathoyizi ananele nempahla yazo zonke izinsana.
- Qinisekisa isikhala esanele sokudlala ngaphandle kokuqhuma. Ezinye izinsana zidinga isikhala somuntu siqu kunabanye, futhi uma lokhu kungavunyelwe, ukukhala kungase kwenzeke.
- Zonke izinsana zidinga ukuhlelwa kwesimiso nesimiso sokuqonda okulindeleke kubo. Qalisa isimiso esinqunyiwe.
- Gcina amandla wezingane ezisencane kanye nezidingo zokudla okunomsoco ezihlangene. Nikeza ukudla okunempilo, isikhathi sokudlala, nesikhathi se-nap.
- Gcina umoya wokuthula emakilasini. Gwema izinsana ezishukumisa ngaphezu kokudlala ngokudla.
Okufanele Ukwenze Lapho Izinsana Zibaleka
Naphezu kwayo yonke imizamo yakho yokuvimbela, izingane ezincane zingase zilume. Nawa amanye amathiphu okumele ukwenze uma ingane encoma:
- Ekunakekelweni kwezinsuku, abasebenzi kufanele baqeqeshwe ukubuka ukukhala. Kufanele futhi babe nokuqeqeshwa ekusizeni kokuqala ukushaya. Ukusizwa kokuqala ukushaya amanxeba njengokulunywa kungaba okungafani nokusiza okuqala kwezinye izinhlobo zokulimala ezifana nokushisa.
- Xhumana nabazali uma ukulunywa kudinga usizo lwezokwelapha. Abazali kufanele baziswe ngaso sonke isikhathi uma ingane yabo ibetha noma ithunyiwe.
- Vumela ingane encane ukuba ibone ukuthi ingane eyalimalayo isizwa. Ukunaka kakhulu ingane eyalunywa kuqinisa iqiniso lokuthi ukushaya akulungile. Uma umntwana ohlabayo ethanda futhi ezolile, lokhu kungaba yisikhathi esingafundiswa sokukhuluma ngozwela .
- Ukusakaza isimo ngokuhambisa izingane kude nabanye kuze kube yilapho sezikhulile.
- Phendula ngokushesha ukushaya, njengoba ukunakwa kwezingane kumfushane.
- Ungalokothi uvumele noma ubani ukuba alume ingane encane ukuba "imfundise ukuthi ibuhlungu."
- Yilungele ukuchazela abazali ukuthi uphendule kanjani ukukhala. Qinisekisa ngezinyathelo ozothatha kuzo ukuvimbela izinsana ukuthi zingaboni esikhathini esizayo.
- Zama ukuqonda isimo noma ukukhungatheka okwenzela ukuluma nokuqinisekisa imizwelo yengane. Isibonelo, uma enye ingane ibambe ithoyizi lezingane, vumela ingane ukuthi ikutshele ukuthi ithukuthele. Bese ukhuluma ngezindlela ezingcono zokubhekana nalolo ntukuthelo uma kwenzeka futhi. Ukubheka kungaba ithuba lokufundisa ingane yakho ngemizwa yakhe .
- Khumbula ukugcina kugxile ekuziphatheni kunokuba ingane. Isibonelo, ukusho ukuthi akulungile uma uluma kungcono kunokuba uthi akulungile uma uluma. Ukusebenzisa OK noma kungalungile kuvame ukuthi kungcono kunokusho ukuthi into enhle noma embi njengoba ifundisa kunokuba ijeziswe.
- Noma yiziphi izindlela ozisebenzisayo ukubhekana nokukhala, zama ukugwema ukuhlambalaza noma ingane.
Izwi elivela ku-Verywell ngokuBing in Toddlers
Uma ingane yakho ishaya, cishe ihlupha yonke indlela. Lokhu kubandakanya ingane noma umuntu omdala oyilumayo, indima yakho njengabahlinzeki bomntanakho noma umhlinzeki wesikhashana, nemizwa yenkomba encane eyabangela ukushaya kuqala.
Uma lokhu kungukulunywa "kokuqala kwesikhathi," kubalulekile ukubuka isimo esabangela ukuluma. Ngezinye izikhathi ukuhlukumezeka kwenzeka ngisho nasezincane, futhi ukunganaki ukuhlukunyezwa nokujezisa ingane ehlukumezekile kungabangela izinkinga zokuziphatha ezengeziwe ngaphansi komugqa.
Ngomntwana oqhubeka ekuluma, ukuhlolwa kwenkulumo nolwimi kubalulekile njengoba kukhona ubudlelwane phakathi kokulibaziseka kokuluma nokukhuluma. Kulesi simo, ukukhala kungase kube "ifulegi elibomvu" elithola ingane usizo oludingayo ekubhekaneni nesifo sokufunda.
Okubaluleke kakhulu ukuthi abantu abadala abathintekayo kufanele baziphathe ngokuthula nangenhlonipho. Abazali bomntwana ochotshoziwe cishe bazokhathazeka ngokuphepha kwengane yabo, kodwa ukumemeza okumangalelwa ngeke kusize. Ngokufanayo, abazali bomntwana okhalayo bangase babe namahloni noma bafisa ukumemeza ngezinsolo zokuthi kungani kubangelwa ukukhala ekuqaleni, kodwa lokhu akusizi. Abahlinzeki bezinsuku, kusukela kwenye indawo, bangase bakhathazeke ngezici zomthetho zokukhala. Izingane zifanekisela ukuziphatha kwabantu abadala phakathi kwabo, futhi izinsana zidinga ukubona ukuthi isimo esinjengokubamba, kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ungazizwela kanjani ngaphakathi, kungasetshenziswa ngokucabangela nangokuhlonipha.
> Umthombo:
> I-American Psychological Association. Imibuzo ehlezayo. 2011. http://www.apa.org/monitor/2011/02/biting.aspx