Indlela yokunikeza ingane yakho amaqiniso ayodinga ukuzivikela
Njengoba kungathandeki futhi kuyesaba njengoba kungenzeka ukuthi abazali bacabange ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi ingane yabo ihlukunyezwe yisidalwa, kubalulekile ukuthi abazali bakhulume nezingane zabo ngokuphepha komuntu siqu . Ukufundisa ingane yakho ukuthi ingazivikela kanjani ekudleni abantwana kubalulekile njengamanye amanyathelo owenza nsuku zonke ukuze umgcine ephephile, njengokuqinisekisa ukuthi usebenzisa ibhande lesikhulu .
Ngokufundisa ingane yakho indlela yokugwema izingozi ezingenzeka futhi okufanele ukwenze uma ezithola usesengozini, uzomnika amandla ingane yakho ukuthi yenzeni uma ungekho lapho ukuyivikela. Nazi ezinye amathiphu ezibalulekile wonke umzali okufanele azi mayelana nendlela yokugcina ingane yakho iphephile.
Amathiphu abalulekile
Fundisa ingane yakho amandla okuthi " Cha. " Abadli bezingane bahle kakhulu ekufuneni abantwana abangase besabe noma besabe ukuphikisa umuntu omdala, noma ngubani ongasongelwa kalula noma ophoqelelwe kalula. Tshela ingane yakho ukuthi ithembele izimo zakhe zemvelo uma ingazizwa zikhululekile noma zesaba umuntu, ukutshela lowo muntu ngezwi elikhulu kakhulu, "Cha!" uma ecelwa ukuba agcine imfihlo noma ahambe nomunye umuntu ngaphandle kwakho, futhi akutshele ngokushesha ngalokho okwenzekile.
Ungacabangi ukuthi ingane yakho izokwazi ukuthi yenzeni. Encwadini yakhe ethi Protecting The Gift: Ukugcina Izingane Nezingane Zisondekile (no-Parents Sane), umeluleki owaziwayo wezokuphepha uGavin de Becker ukhuluma ngengxenye ye -Oprah Winfrey Show eyenziwa ngo-1993.
Kulombukiso , abakhiqizi be- Oprah kanye nommeli wezokuphepha kwezingane uKen Wooden baqhuba ukuhlolwa (ngokuvunyelwa kwabazali) lapho bakwazi ukukhanga ngempumelelo ingane ngayinye ebambe iqhaza ekuvivinyweni ngaphandle kwebala lokudlala ngaphakathi kwamasekhondi angu-35. Ngaphambi kokuhlolwa, abazali babefakezela ukuthi ingane yabo ngeke ikhulume nomuntu ongaziwayo noma iphume epaki nomuntu engazi.
Akungabazeki ukuthi, bekungalungile ukucabanga ukuthi ingane yabo ngeke isengozini.
Ungagxila "engozini engaziwa." Kubantwana, ikakhulukazi izingane ezincane, umqondo wokuthi ngubani ngempela "ongowesihambi" kungase kudideke. Bangase bathande omunye umuntu obheka ukwesabeka, noma ngubani onamandla. Eqinisweni, ochwepheshe bezokuphepha kwabantwana baye babonisa ukuhlolwa okufana nalokhu okukhulunywe ngenhla ukuthi izingane zivame ukulandela umuntu uma lowo muntu ebonakala enobungane futhi ekholisa ngokwanele (ngokucela ingane ukuba ibasize bathole i-puppy elahlekile, isibonelo).
Ngaphezu kwalokho, njengoba u-Dekerker ephawula ekuvikeleni isipho , ngokutshela ingane ukuthi ingathembeli abantu abangabazi, abazali bathi ngokulungile ukuthemba abantu angase bazi, njengomakhelwane noma umsizi endaweni yokudlela. Okubaluleke kakhulu, futhi akubheki iqiniso lokuthi izingozi ezinganeni zikhulu kunomuntu owaziwayo kubo noma wena kunomuntu ongaziwayo, uNancy McBride, uMqondisi wezokuVikela kaZwelonke esikhungweni sikazwelonke sezingane ezilahlekile nokuxhashazwa (NCMEC).
Esikhundleni sokutshela ingane yakho ukuba ingalokothi ikhulume nabantu abangabazi, okungenzeka empeleni ingamvimbela ekufuneni usizo lapho ilahlekile, imfundise ukuthola owesifazane - mhlawumbe umuntu onomntwana - futhi umcele ukuthi abize u-911 noma shayela abazali bakhe bese ubatshela ukuthi ungubani.
Okunye okukhethwa kukho: "Tshela ingane yakho ukuba ihambe kumabhalane wokuthengisa onogama lomama, i-uniformed law-force officer, noma umuntu esiteshini semininingwane," kusho uMcBride.
Futhi uma ubona ingane ebonakala ilahlekile? I-NCMEC yakhiqiza ucezu okuthiwa, "Yini Okufanele Uyenze Uma Ubona Ingane Ebonakala Ilahlekelwa?" ukusiza abantu bazi ukuthi benzeni uma behlangana nengane ebonakala edingwa usizo lokuthola abazali bakhe noma umnakekeli.
Tshela ingane yakho ukuthi akekho okufanele ahlasele isikhala sakhe siqu. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi endaweni yomphakathi noma ekhaya, gcizelela ingane yakho ukuthi akekho okufanele asondele kuye ngaphandle komnakekeli noma omunye wabazali bakhe abakhona.
Khetha abantu abadala abathembekile. Yenza uhlu olufushane lwabantu abadala "abaphephile" - njengalumekazi, umntanami, ugogo nomkhulu noma umakhelwane - abavunyelwe ukumthatha esikoleni noma bamnakekele lapho ungekho noma sekwephuzile ukuthatha. Mtshele ukuthi angalokothi ahambe nanoma ubani omunye ngaphandle kokuba uvumelane ngaphambili ukuthi uphambuke ohlwini, futhi njalo uqiniseke ukuthi uyazi kahle ukuthi ubani ozomthatha.
Mtshele ukuthi angalokothi angene emotweni noma aye endaweni ethile ngaphandle komzali noma umnakekeli. Gcizelela ingane yakho ukuthi uma othile eyazi (kodwa hhayi umuntu omdala othembekile) noma umuntu ongakaze ahlangane naye ngaphambi kokuzama ukumbamba noma ukumphoqelela ukuba ahambe naye, kufanele akhamuluke ngokuzwakalayo, "Usizo!" akuyena ubaba wami! " noma "Usizo! Lo akuyena umama wami!" Mtshele ukuthi kufanele futhi agijime, futhi uma ethathwa, ukuthi kufanele ajezise, agibe futhi agibe ngokuqinile ngangokunokwenzeka.
Ungafaki ukwesaba. Ukuvula izindaba zakusihlwa kunokwanele ukwenza izingane - nabantu abadala - bazizwe sengathi kunengozi ehlala kuyo yonke indawo. Ukwesaba zonke izimo kungaba empeleni ukukhiqiza futhi kungenza umntwana wesabe konke okusemandleni akhe ukuthi angabhekana nokusongelwa yizisongelo.
Kunalokho, unikeza ingane yakho ukuzethemba , amandla, namathuluzi okuvimbela nokulawula ingozi engenzeka. Esikhundleni sokugxila engozini yonke ingane yakho engayibhekana nazo, vumela ingane yakho ngokukhuluma naye ngokuthi uzoziqaphela kanjani futhi agweme izimo ezingase zibe yingozi futhi aphathe izimo ezithile ezingalindelekile. Ngokwesibonelo, uzokwenzenjani uma ehlukaniswa ngengozi endaweni yakho yomphakathi? (Phendula: Funa owesifazane onomntwana noma umntwana bese umcela usizo.) Noma iyiphi indlela engcono yokuyiphatha uma othile eyaziyo - ethi, umakhelwane noma umngane womndeni - mcele ukuba eze naye, ethi unomthumelele ukuze akuthole esimweni esiphuthumayo? (Impendulo: Yazi ukuthi abantu abadala abathembele kuphela ababizwa ngokuthi nguwe - njengotogo nomkhulu noma esinye isihlobo - futhi akekho omunye ovumelekile ukuba eze futhi amthole.)
Sebenzisa izinsiza zezingane. Buka amavidiyo afana ne -Safe Side - Ukuphepha Kwamaqhinga: Amathiphu ashisayo Ukugcina izingane ezipholile ziphephile nabantu abangazi futhi uKinda bazi , bephethe uJohn Walsh nomntanakho. I-website ye-Safe Side iphinde ifake izinsiza ezenzelwe izingane ezifana ne-quizzes, puzzle, kanye namathiphu okuphepha.
Isikhungo sikaZwelonke sezingane ezingekho kanye nokuxhashazwa (NCMEC) sinomnotho wezinsiza zokuphepha ezinganeni mahhala kubazali, ababheki, nabantwana ku-Missingkids.com.
Phinda le milayezo. Njengoba nje ungathanda ukufaka imoto, sebenzisa lezi zeluleko zokuphepha ngezingane zakho. (Kwenze lokhu ikakhulukazi emuva kwesikhathi esikoleni nasekuqaleni kwehlobo, lapho izingane zakho cishe zingaphandle kweqiniso - iqiniso eliyaziwa kakhulu yizilwane zasendle). Uma ungaphandle endaweni enabantu abaningi njengendawo yokudayisa noma epaki, cela ingane yakho ukuthi uzokwenzenjani uma uzohlukaniswa. Ngumuphi wabantu abakuzungezile ongayi ukuyosiza? Mtshele abanye abantu abangamsiza. Uyakhumbula inombolo yakho yocingo?