Uma ngabe uqaphele ukuthi ukuzithokozisa kwakho okuphakathi kwakho kwehla, kungenzeka ukuthi ucinga amasu wokwakha ukuzethemba. Ngenkathi ungenakuyeka ingane yakho ukuba ihlukumeze ngokuhlukumeza ukuthi amakhono namzimba abo bafanelana kanjani nabanye, kunezindlela eziningi onganikeza ngazo ukusekelwa.
Khuthaza amaTweens Ukubaluleka Amakhono Awo
Uma ama-tweens ewazisa imisebenzi enza kahle, azithanda kakhulu, ubhala uJohn Santrock, umbhali we- Life-Span Development .
Ungazakhela ukuzethemba ngokugcizelela ukubaluleka kwamakhono akho e-tween. Isibonelo, tshela wena kanye nezifundiswa zemiklomelo yomndeni wakho futhi unganaki izimbangi. Kwenzeka kanjalo-ke, kodwa ukuthi ingane yakho inkulu kakhulu ku-basketball kodwa inzima ekilasini. Lokhu kungaholela ekubeni nomuzwa wokuzethemba ngokweqile ngenxa yokuthi akulungile "kokubalulekile." Ngakho yenza ama-athletics (noma ngabe yiliphi ikhono elibekiwe) libale! Qaphela ukuthi akudingeki ukuba uhloniphe izifundiswa ukuze uzuze ama-athletics; ungamane ubenze babe ngaphezulu ngisho nokubaluleka. Ngezansi: asikwazi ukukhetha izindawo izingane zethu ezivelele kuzo, kepha sithola ukukhetha lapho sikhipha udumo nokwamukelwa.
Lalela futhi uqaphele
Sisazi ukuthi isipho esikhulu kunazo zonke esingabapha izingane zethu yisikhathi nendaba eyodwa. Leli qiniso liyiqiniso ikakhulukazi mayelana nokwakha isithunzi. Ukulalela akudingeki kwenzeke ngobuningi obukhulu ukuze busebenze.
Ngisho nemaminithi ayishumi okunakekelwa kweqiniso kufanelekile ngaphezu kwamahora amathathu okuba "ndawonye" kodwa ungalokothi ugxile kulokho okuphakathi kwakho okusho khona. Ukuba umlaleli omuhle kusho ukunganiki izahlulelo, ukugxekwa noma iseluleko. Mane uzwe ukuthi ingane yakho isho ukuthini futhi uphinde uphendule imibono yakhe ukukhombisa ukuthi ulalele.
Isibonelo, uma i-kati yakho ikhuluma ngothisha nabangani bakhe bebanamathele ezinkingeni zabo, ungase uthi, "Uzizwa sengathi akekho osikhathalelayo esikoleni." Kungase kubonakale ku-hokey ekuqaleni, kodwa izikhathi ezijwayelekile zokulalela ezicabangelayo zingasiza ingane ukuba izwe iqinisekiswe futhi ibalulekile.
Khuthaza Imithombo Eyengeziwe Yokusekela
Isikhathi sokulalela nabazali sinenzuzo, kodwa izikhathi ezingu-10 zidinga ukunakekelwa okwengeziwe, ukuqinisekiswa, nokusekelwa esikukwazi ukunikeza. Ngaphezu kwalokho, kunempilo ukukhuthaza izingane zethu ukuba zithembele kwabanye ngaphandle kwethu. Ngakho-ke ungakwazi ukwakha ukuzethemba ngokugqugquzela ubudlelwane obusekelayo, obunenjongo uma ubona lokhu kuqala ukuma. Okungcono, lokhu kungaba ubudlelwane bomdala, njengomqeqeshi, uthisha noma umuntu ongokwenkolo, kepha ubudlelwane bontanga obusekelayo bungasiza . Ungase ucabange nezinhlelo zokuqeqesha ezihlelekile, kusho uDkt. Santrock. Yiqiniso, noma kunjalo, abayishumi nambili akufanele baphoqelelwe kunoma yini; Ukuba nawe uhlela ngobuhlobo ubudlelwane babo kungadlula umqondo wabo wokukwazi nokuhlonipha okungaphezu kokusiza.
Bayeke Bahluleke
Ukuvumela ingane ukuba ihluleke futhi ihluleke kubalulekile ukwakha ukuzethemba kwabo, ngokusho kweThe NYU Child Study Center. Lokhu kungase kuzwakale ku-counter-intuitive: Kufanele ngivumele ingane yami yenza kahle ukuze ikwazi ukuzizwa kahle ngabo?
Ngelinye igama, yebo! Abantu bathola umuzwa wokwazi ngokuthatha izinselele ezintsha futhi baphumelele kuzo. Uma udambisa ukwehluleka, ududuza ingane yakho ekuzameni izinto ezintsha. Tweens bafunde ukuqina nokubhekana namakhono lapho bebhekana nezinkinga. Ngcono nakakhulu, lapho befinyelela emgomweni abaye bafuna, bazuza umqondo wobunikazi beqiniso kanye nokukwazi.
Yiba Isibonelo Esihle
AbakwaTweens bafunda ukuba nokuzethemba okunempilo ngokubuka abantu abadala abakuzungezile babonisa ukuzihlonipha okunempilo. Ngakho-ke, cabanga ukuthi uvame kangakanani ukwenza ukuthuka ukuphawula ngokuthinta wena njengokuthi "Nginamafutha" noma "Angisoze nganini nanoma yini." Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ungatshela kanjani ingane yakho ukuthi iyamangalisa futhi ingenza noma yini, ifunda okuningi ngezenzo zakho kunamazwi akho.
Ngakho-ke, ukusebenza ukuze ukhulise ukuzethemba kwakho kungabasiza ngokuqondile ingane yakho. Yilokho-ke, inqubo ende ngokwayo. Okwamanje, ungakwazi ukugxila ekubambeni nasekunciphiseni izimvo zakho ezimbi. Ngeke nje uzizwe ungcono, kepha uhlangothi lwakho mhlawumbe luzokwenza, futhi!