Izizathu Singazikhulumi Ngokungahambi Nokwenza Nokungathathi Ngaphandle

by URachel Gurevich; Kubukezwe ngu-Anita Sadaty, MD

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Ukuthula okuzungeze ukungakwazi ukukhulelwa nokukhulelwa kwesisu kuvela kokubili ngaphakathi nangaphandle. Anakin Tseng / Getty Izithombe

Naphezu kwemizamo eminingi yokwehlisa ukuthula nokukhulelwa kokukhulelwa, ukuzala nokukhulelwa kwesisu kuhlale kunesihloko.

Labo abahluphekayo abahlanganyeli nakho kwabanye. Abangewona amalungu e-infertility-and-loss of club abazi ukuthi bangasabela kanjani noma benzeni lapho betshelwa ngomzabalazo womngani. Abanye abathembekile bangakhululekile ukuzwa ngakho nhlobo.

Inhlamba inamandla.

Kungani?

Ngesibhangqwana esisodwa kwabayisishiyagalombili ababhekene nokungabi nabantwana - futhi kuze kufike ku-25% wokukhulelwa okuphela ekukhulelweni komzimba - kungani umphakathi ungakhululekile ukuxoxa ngalezi zenzakalo ezijwayelekile zokuphila?

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Imizwa Yokuhlukana Nokuhlazeka

Ukungahambi kahle nokukhulelwa komzimba kungenza ube nomuzwa wokuthi uphukile, unamahloni futhi uyedwa. Yazi lokhu: awuphukile, awuwedwa, futhi awunaso into yokuba namahloni. I-Henrik Sorensen / Getty Images

Uma indoda noma owesifazane ezwa ukuthi ayinamandla, ukuhlazeka kuyindlela evamile futhi evamile . Abantu abangenasifo sabantu bavame ukuhlanganyela lokho abazizwa bephukile noma abangenasici.

Abesifazane namadoda athile abhekana nokulahlekelwa ukukhulelwa - ikakhulukazi ukulahlekelwa okuphindaphindiwe - banokuphendula okufanayo. Kungani umzimba wami ungeke ubambelele emntwaneni? Yini engalungile nge-sperm yami noma izakhi zofuzo ezingenakusiza ukudala impilo ehlala njalo?

Ngaphezulu kwalokhu, abantu bangase bazibuze ukuthi benze okuthile okubangela ukulahlekelwa.

Izimbangela eziningi zokungazalwa nokukhulelwa kwesisu akuzona ngaphansi kokulawulwa okuqondile kwabashadile. Kodwa-ke, ngisho nalapho umuntu ekwazi lokhu, umuzwa wokukhathazeka wokuthi lokhu konke iphutha lami libadubula.

Ngokuthakazelisayo, awuboni lokhu njalo ngezinkinga zezokwelapha.

Bangaki abantu abane-type 1 yesifo sikashukela, isifo se-asthma, noma isifo se-celiac abazilahla ngokwabo, noma banamahloni okuvuma ukuthi banesifo sabo?

Uyini umehluko?

Ngezansi, kusukela ekuboneni okunengqondo, akukho umehluko.

Ukungabi nalutho nokulahleka kokukhulelwa yizindaba zezokwelapha. Akuyona amaphutha omlingiswa.

Ukungabi nalutho nokukhulelwa kwesisu kungenzi umuntu ongaphansi, ungowesifazane ongaphansi, futhi ungumuntu ongaphansi.

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Ukungabi nalutho nokuqhathaniswa komshado Ukubhekana Nezingxenye Zomzimba "Phansi Kulapho"

Ezweni lapho imithombo yezokwelapha egunyazayo isaba ukusebenzisa amagama afana nesifazane noma i-penis, singalindela kanjani ukuxoxa ngezihloko ezihlotshaniswa eduze ezifana nokungafaki nokukhulelwa kokukhulelwa ?. @RobinPregnancy / Twitter.com

Ukuzala, ukukhulelwa kwesisu, nokukhulelwa kuxhunyaniswa ngokuqondile nocansi kanye nezitho zokuzala. Uma ucabanga ukuthi awusebenzisi izindlela zokwelapha , uma ufuna ukukhulelwa, kufanele ulale ucansi.

Kusukela indaba ka-Adamu no-Eva, izakhi zofuzo nokukhiqiza ziye zahlanganiswa namahloni. Izihloko ezibandakanya indawo yesisu nomzimba womzimba zifana nalokho.

(Qaphela ukuthi ukungabi nabantwana kanye nokulahleka kokukhulelwa ngokuvamile akuhlobene nenkinga ngezocansi ngokwabo noma ubunzima bokuziphatha ngokobulili ngokwayo. Noma kunjalo, inhlangano ikhona ezingqondweni zabantu, futhi lokho kwanele ukubenza bangakhululeki nesihloko.)

Icala ngephutha, thatha lesi sibonelo sezokuxhumana: @womenshealth yi-feed ye-Twitter yeHhovisi leMpilo yabesifazane, eliyingxenye yoMnyango WezeMpilo WezeMpilo waseMelika.

Ngo-Agasti 11, 2015, bathumele i-Tweet eyaqala ngokuthi "Ukubuza ukuthi iyiphi indlela engcono kakhulu yokuhlanza ... phansi lapho? "

Lona uhulumeni ugijima impilo yebesifazane i-Twitter feed ... kodwa abazange bazizwe bekhululekile ukusebenzisa igama elifanele.

Ngenxa yemithombo yezokuxhumana, abasebenzisi abaningi be-Twitter babhikisha ukukhwabanisa, kuhlanganise nochwepheshe wokukhulelwa uRobin Elise Weiss (@RobinPregnancy).

Ekuphenduleni, @womenshealth ithunyelwe ukuthi bayokusebenzisa i-terminology efanele. I-follow-up tweet: "Siyavumelana ne- #VaginaIsNotaDirtyWord futhi sizoqiniseka ukuthi siyayisebenzisa esikhathini esizayo."

Uma ochwepheshe bezokwelapha bengakhululekile ngamazwi afana nomama nesipenisi, singalindela kanjani ukukhuluma ngokuzala nokukhulelwa komzimba, izindaba ezihlobene eduze kangaka?

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Abantu Abasazi Okushiwo - Futhi Bakusho Izinto Ezimbi Ngokuvamile

Ukukhuluma nge-infertility nokukhulelwa kwesisu kwenza abanye abantu bangakhululekile. Njengoba bengakwazi ukuthi bangathini, bavame ukukhuluma ngephutha ngezinto ezimbi. inharrem öner / Getty Izithombe

Ufuna ukwenza umuntu angakhululeki? Batshele ukuthi usanda kubhekana nokulahlekelwa kokukhulelwa. Noma ukuthi ubhekene nokungasebenzi.

Ngenkathi labo asebevele benokuhlangenwe nakho kwabo bangase basabele ngendlela efanele (mhlawumbe - hhayi ngaso sonke isikhathi ), iningi lizogwinya.

Abantu abaningi - abantu abanobuhle nabanozwela - abakhathazekile ngezihloko ezinzima ezifana nokungahambi kahle nokukhulelwa kwesisu. Abawazi nje ukuthi bangathini.

Ukungabi nalutho akusona isimo kuphela lapho abantu bethi izinto ezingalungile. Ukufa, isehlukaniso, nezinye izinkinga eziningi zezokwelapha zithola ukwabelana okungenakuqondakala.

Ngeshwa, ngenxa yokunganaki kwabo, nabo bavame ukusho izinto ezingalungile.

Kungani ungazami nje i-IVF? Okungenani akuyona umdlavuza. Kungani ungaphenduli nje?

12 Izinto Okungafanele Zisho Kumuntu Ongenalutho

O, wawungamaviki ambalwa nje ukhulelwe? Akuyona into enkulu, ukukhulelwa kwesisu kwenzeka njalo. Kufanele uthole ngaphezulu kwalo. Kwakuyiqembu kuphela lamaseli, hhayi ingane yangempela.

8 Izinto Okungafanele Utshele Ngomunye Omunye Obephethe Ukuthutha

Amazwana okusola nawo avamile.

Akufanele ulinde isikhathi eside ukuze ube nezingane. Kufanele ushintshe ukudla kwakho; khona-ke uzokhulelwa.

Nakhu okwenzeka njalo:

Umuntu ongenalutho uveza umzabalazo wabo. Bahlangatshezwa ngamagama ahlosiwe kahle kepha amahloni amabiza enza bazizwe bezibi nakakhulu. Futhi, ngenxa yalokho, bancane amathuba okuba babelane ngomzabalazo wabo nomunye umuntu.

Kungumjikelezo ononya futhi kunomthelela omkhulu wokuthulisa.

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Izinselele Zomzali Kungenza Ukwehluleka Ukuzwelana Kunzima

Ukubeletha umntwana osanda kuzalwa akulula. Ukulungiswa kunzima kwabesilisa nabesifazane abaningi. Tara Moore / Getty Izithombe

Uyazi ukuthi yini enye enye into? Ukukhuluma ngezinkinga zokukhulelwa, ukubeletha, kanye nobuzali.

Hlanganisa ubuhlungu bokungabi nabantwana ngokuhlukunyezwa kobuzali, futhi uzothola ukusabela okungalungile.

Ucwaningo lwaseJalimane lwababambiqhaza abangu-20,000 luhlolisise ukuthi abantu abanokuqukethwe babephila kanjani ngaphambi nangemva kwemicimbi enkulu yokuphila. Abacwaningi babeqaphele ukuba bangazibuze ngqo ukuthi umcimbi wokuphila wawuthinta kanjani amazinga abo injabulo.

Ngamanye amazwi, abazange babuze, "Ingabe ujabule noma ujabule kakhulu ngemva kokuzalwa kwengane yakho?" Ngoba abantu bangaqamba amanga. Abantu abambalwa kakhulu bangasho ukuthi bajabule kakhulu ngenxa yokuzalwa kwengane.

Abacwaningi bathola ukuthi ukulinganisa kwabazali benhlalakahle nenjabulo kunciphile kakhulu ngonyaka wokuqala wokuzalwa kwengane.

Eqinisweni, ngokwesilinganiso, ukwehla kwenhlalakahle kwakunamandla ngemva kokuzalwa kwengane kunokuba kuphele ukushona komlingani, isehlukaniso noma ukungasebenzi.

Ukubeka izinkinga zokubeletha zibe ngombono, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, abacwaningi bathola nokuthi ukuba nezingane ezimbili kwaphakamisa inhlalakahle yabantu jikelele. Iphule elikhulu livame ukwenzeka phakathi nonyaka wokuqala wokulungiswa.

Manje, ake sicabangele labo abanenkinga yokungasebenzi.

Umuntu ongenalutho - ozwa ubuhlungu obukhulu obungokomzwelo - uhlanganyela umzabalazo wabo nomngane osanda kubantwana noma ngisho nezingane ezindala kodwa ukhumbula lezo zinsuku ezinzima zakuqala.

Umzali ocindezelekile futhi okhathele uthi (ngaphandle kokucabanga) into enjengokuthi, Ungathatha izingane zami! Awunazi ukuthi unenhlanhla kangakanani.

Lokhu kuyabuhlungu kumuntu ongenalutho ngenxa yokuthi bayichaza njengomunye umuntu ongaqapheli isibusiso abanaso. Futhi kuyindlela yokulahla ubuhlungu bomzwelo bomuntu ongenalutho. Kusho ukuthi ukungabi nabantwana okungalungile akukubi njengoba becabanga ukuthi.

Phakathi naleso sikhathi, umzali uthi lokhu (okungalungile) isitatimende ngoba ukubeletha kuyinkimbinkimbi kakhulu , kodwa abakwazi ukukhuluma ngaleyo nhlobo nabantu ngqo. Ngakho-ke iphuma ngezikhathi ezingenakwenzeka njengaleli.

Lezi zindlela eziholela ekuthuleni okuningi.

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Izimfihlo Zokuqala Zokukhulelwa Ziholela Ekulahlekelweni Kwemfihlo Yokukhulelwa

Izimfihlo zokukhulelwa zakuqala ziletha ukuthula kwangaphambilini kokuthutha kwesisu. i-kupicoo / i-Getty Images

Esinye sezizathu ezinkulu abantu abangakhulumi ngazo ngokukhulelwa kwesisu kwangaphambili ngoba akekho okhuluma ngokukhulelwa kokuqala. Awukho "okufanele" ukutshela abantu.

Kubonakala sengathi kukhona umthetho ongabhalwanga ukuthi awukwazi ukutshela abantu okhulelwe kuze kube yilapho semester yesibili.

Kufanele ukwabelana, futhi kungenzeka ukuthi uthole iziyalo nezinqumo:

O, kuyinhlanhla ukutshela abantu! Ungatsheli muntu.
TMI. Ulwazi oluningi kakhulu. Ungatshele abantu abakhulelwe kuze kube yilapho wonke umuntu ekubona ukuthi ukhulelwe nje ngokubuka.
Othandekayo, uma utshela abantu, futhi ulahlekelwa ukukhulelwa, kuzodingeka utshele wonke umuntu mayelana nokulahleka.

Uma ungafuni ukwabelana ngezindaba zokukhulelwa kwakho, lokho kuyamukeleka ngokuphelele. Abantu kufanele bahloniphe leso sinqumo.

Isikhathi Nendlela Yokutshela Abantu Ukhulelwe Ngemuva Kokungabikho

Ngalokho kusho, uma ufuna ukuhlanganyela, akufanele uhlazeke futhi wesabe ekuthuleni.

Ekugcineni ngibheke, ukwabelana ngezindaba zakho zokukhulelwa kwezindaba akuphakamisi ingozi yokuthola isisu.

Futhi kungani kufanele ukwabelana ngokukhulelwa kwangaphambi kwesikhathi kubhekwe ngokuthi i-TMI engaphezu kokuhlanganyela izindaba mayelana nokukhulelwa kamuva? (Ngicabanga ukuthi abantu bangayibona yini i-TMI uma kamuva ukukhulelwa kwakungabonakali kubantu abangaphandle .Umcabango owesabekayo ...)

Ngokuqondene nobungozi bokulahlekelwa ngumntwana, futhi udinga ukutshela abantu olahlekelwe ngumntwana emva kwalokho, yini engalungile ngalokhu?

Yebo, kuyoba buhlungu. Kodwa okungenani awuyikulila ukulahlekelwa yedwa. Ukulahlekelwa kwakho ngeke kube okungabonakali. Kanjalo kungcono kunokuhlupheka ngokuthula.

Awudingi ukuhlupheka ngokuthula.

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Izinkolelo ezingalungile mayelana nokungahambi kahle nokuhlukumezeka

Izinkolelo ezizungeze ukungabi nabantwana nokukhulelwa komzimba kwenza kube nzima kakhulu ukuba abantu bezwe futhi bazwisise. Cultura RM / Frank no Helena / Getty Images

Kuningi lokungalungi ngaphandle kwalokho okufakazela ukuthulisa nokuhlazeka.

Ulwazi olungalungile lukhona ezinhlangothini zombili, nabo - labo abahlupheka ngokuthula nalabo abangezwa izindaba zethu.

Ezinye izinkolelo eziholela kokubili ukuthula nokuntula ukusekelwa zifaka:

Ukungabi nalutho nokukhulelwa kwesisu kukhona iphutha lowesifazane. Okunye okwenzayo kubangela lezi zinkinga.
Ukungahambi kahle kuyinkinga kuphela yabesifazane "abalingani" abalinde "isikhathi eside kakhulu" ukuba babe nezingane.
Ukungafanisi kuyinkinga yowesifazane.
Ukuzala kuyinkinga kuphela imibhangqwana engqingili .
Ukulawulwa kokubeletha kubangelwa ukungabi nesisu nokukhulelwa kwesisu.
Abantu abacebile bayathandwa kakhulu. Abantu abangenayo i-infertile bayabaluleka kakhulu.
Ukukhipha isisu kuyisijeziso esivela kuNkulunkulu.
Ukungabi nalutho kuyisijeziso esivela kuNkulunkulu.
Indoda engakwazi ukuphazamisa umkakhe ibuthakathaka futhi ingaphansi kwesilisa.
Owesifazane ongakwazi ukukhulelwa noma ukubambelela ekukhulelwe ungaphansi kwesifazane.
Ukungahambi kahle kubangelwa ukungakwazi ukulala nobulili.
Ukudabuka ngokukhulelwa kwangaphambili akuvamile. Kufanele "uvele uthole ngaphezulu."
Ukungabi nalutho kuyinkinga "yokuphila" - hhayi isifo.
Akekho ofuna ukuzwa ukungabi namntwana noma indaba yokukhulelwa kwesisu.

Ngakho-ke sonke sisobala - akukho okunye okungenhla okuyiqiniso.

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Phuma Phandle Uphule Ukuthula

Uma usulungile, wabelane ngendaba yakho. Okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho kuyisikhali esinamandla kunazo zonke ngokumelene namahloni nokuthula kokungakhulelwa. Dave no-Les Jacobs / Getty Images

Ukuhlazeka nokuthula kungaphila emaceleni omnyama. Kufana nokubunjwa. Iyakhula uma ifihliwe ekukhanyeni.

Sekuyisikhathi siphula ukuthula nokungabi nesisu. Sekuyisikhathi sokuyeka ukuzizwa sinamahloni ngezinkinga zezokwelapha esingenaso ukulawula okuncane.

Qala ukukhuluma nge-infertility nokukhulelwa kwesisu. Yabelana nakho okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho.

Yabelana nabo noma ngabe ukungazalwa kwakho nokulahlekelwa kokukhulelwa kwenzeke eminyakeni edlule. Eqinisweni, ikakhulukazi wabelane ngakho - usendaweni enamandla ukutshela indaba yakho kunaleyo ebanzi.

Uma abantu besabela kabi uma wabelana (futhi abanye bazoba), bahlathulule ngobumnene ukuthi kungani abakushoyo belimaza noma bangamanga. Batshele ukuthi bangathini. Siza.

Ukuhlanganyela indaba yakho yomuntu siqu kuzosiza wonke umuntu obhekene nokugula noma ukuphuma kwesisu.

Ukutshela izindaba zethu yisikhali sethu esinamandla kunazo zonke esiba nazo ngokumelene namahloni nokuhlambalaza kokungazalwa nokukhulelwa kwesisu.

Okuningi ekukhulumeni ngokungazali:

_Imithombo:

_{UMargolis R1, Myrskylä M. "Inhlalakahle Yomzali Okuzungezile Ukuzalwa Okuqala Njengomnqumo Wokuqhubeka Okuqhubekayo Kwamaqembu".} _{2015 Aug; 52 (4): 1147-66.} _{i-doi: 10.1007 / s13524-015-0413-2.} _{http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4531135/}

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