Kusuka ekukhungeni kuya enhlanhleni ukwehlisa iLibido
Isikhathi eside ukuzama ukukhulelwa kungathinta kabi impilo yakho yobulili. Ngaphambi kokuzama ukukhulelwa, ubulili cishe buyinto ejabulisayo futhi ngethemba lokuthi ngithandeka. Kwakuyindlela yokuxhumana nomlingani wakho . Ukuzama kwakho kokuqala ukukhulelwa kwezinsuku kungenzeka kube kuhle. Emva kweminyaka yokusebenzisa ukulawula ukubeletha , ukulala ocansini ngaphandle kokwesaba ukukhulelwa kungaba okuthakazelisayo.
Noma kunjalo, ukuzama ukukhulelwa isikhathi eside kungashintsha konke lokhu.
Uma wena noma umlingani wakho uzizwa ukuthi ubuhlobo bakho bocansi buye buthathaka ngenxa yokungabi nabantwana, awuyedwa.
Lezi ezinye zezindlela eziningi zokungaboni kahle kungathinta ubulili.
Ubulili Buya Buhlungu
Ubulili bungaba umthombo wokukhungatheka uma uzama ukukhulelwa.
Ubulili buyisikhumbuzo salokho okungahambi ngendlela okufanele.
Sonke siyazi kusukela esikoleni samabanga aphansi esikoleni sokuthi ubulili kungokwenza abantwana. (Futhi uma sikholwa uthisha wethu wezempilo, sasikholelwa ukuthi ubulili - kanye kuphela, nganoma yisiphi isikhathi - kungasenza sibe intsha ekhulelwe.)
Bambalwa abantu abaye babheka umbono wokuthi ubulili angeke buholele ekukhulelweni ngokushesha futhi kumane. Uma izinto "zingasebenzi ngendlela efanele," ucansi luvela ekucindezeni ukucindezeleka ekubeni ngumdali ocindezelayo.
Okuhlangenwe nakho kungakhungathekisa kakhulu.
Ubulili Buqala Ukuzizwa Njengendlela Yokukhetha
Konke ukuhlekisana komunye nomunye, "Ake senze umntwana," ngaphambi nje kocansi?
Lawa magama angase abe ukuvula ekuqaleni. Kodwa ngemva kwezinyanga noma iminyaka yokuzama ukukhulelwa, lawo mazwi yinto yokugcina ongathanda ukuyizwa.
Ubulili bungase buzwe njengomsebenzi. Kungase uzizwe njengento okumele ukwenze ukuze ufeze umgomo. Futhi lowo mgomo - wokwenza umntwana - uzizwa ungeke ukwazi ukufinyelela.
Engeza ekucindezelekeni kwesikhathi sokuvota , noma utshelwe udokotela wakho ukuba abe nobulili ezinsukwini ezithile, futhi ubulili bungase buzwe njengomsebenzi wesikole.
Ubulili nokuhlazeka
Inhlamba ayiyona into engaziwa ekunganeni noma ngokocansi.
UDkt. Brene Brown uchaza amahloni njengomuzwa wokungafanelanga uthando nokuthandwa.
Ukuhlazeka ekuziphatheni ngokobulili kungahle kuboniswe njengokuzizwa kungakufaneleki ukukhanga komunye umuntu.
Kwabesifazane, ukungabi nabantwana kungabenza bazizwe besifazane abangaphansi. Amabele kanye ne-hip bavame ukucatshangwa njengezimpawu zobulili zokubeletha nokunakekelwa kwengane. Ukungazi lutho kungathatha lezo zinkinga kude.
Owesifazane angase angaqondi ukuthi umlingani wakhe angamthola kanjani ekhangayo, ikakhulukazi uma ezwa "ewonakele" ngokungafaki.
Kubantu, ukungabi nabantwana kungalimaza imizwa yabo yobuningi.
Ngenkathi abesifazane besengozini yokulwa nokucindezeleka noma ukukhathazeka ngesikhathi sokubeletha, amadoda enomzabalazo wesilisa ongenakuhlukunyezwa kakhulu ngehlazo.
Amadoda angase abe nomuzwa wokuthi "angaphansi komuntu" uma isibalo sabo sabantu besincane noma singakwazi ukuthola umlingani wabo okhulelwe, nganoma yiziphi izizathu.
Bangase bakhathazeke ngokuthi umlingani wabo uzobashiya "indoda yangempela."
Uma ungazizwa ufanelwe uthando, noma ungazizwa ucansi noma ukhangele, ubuhlobo bakho bobulili buzohlupheka.
Ukukhathazeka, Ukucindezeleka, nocansi
Ukukhathazeka nokucindezeleka kuvamile emibhangqwaneni ephathelene nokungabi nabantwana, ikakhulukazi abesifazane. Ngokubili, ukukhathazeka nokucindezeleka kokubili kungathinta ubuhlobo bakho bobulili.
Isifiso esingezansi socansi yisimpawu esivamile sokucindezeleka.
Ukukhathazeka kungabangela nokuhlukunyezwa ngokobulili. Ukukhathazeka ikakhulukazi okuphathelene nokuya ocansini kuvamile emibhangqwaneni ephathelene nokungabi nabantwana.
Ukukhubazeka ngokocansi kwabesifazane nabesilisa
Ucwaningo luye lwabona ukuthi abesifazane nabesilisa abanesifo sofuba cishe banokukhubazeka ngokocansi.
Ukukhubazeka ngokobulili kubhekisela ekubeni nezinkinga nganoma yiliphi isigaba sesenzo socansi, kufaka nesifiso sokulala ocansini, ukuvuka ngesikhathi socansi, ne- orgasm .
Akunzima ukucabanga ukuthi izinkinga ezikhulunywe ngenhla - amahloni, ukukhathazeka, ukucindezeleka, nokukhungatheka - kungaholela ekusebenziseni ngokocansi.
Ukucindezela ukwenza kungaholela ekusebenziseni ngokocansi. Bobabili amadoda nabesifazane bangase babe nakho lokhu ngenkathi bezama ukukhulelwa.
Kubantu, ukukhathazeka kokusebenza, i-ejaculation ngaphambi kwesikhathi, kanye nokusebenza komzimba erectile kungase kwenzeke.
Esinye isifundo, uma kuqhathaniswa amadoda angenalutho eneqembu elilawulayo labesilisa abavundile, cishe amadoda angaphezu kokuphindwe kabili abanesifo sokungasebenzi kwesifo se-erectile.
Kwesinye isifundo sokungasebenzi komzimba ngokobulili, abesifazane abangama-40% abanesifo sokubeletha batholakala besengozini yokuhlukumezeka ngokocansi. Lokhu kuqhathaniswa nama-25% weqembu lokulawula.
Okubalulekile Ngokuzama Ukuthola Nezocansi
Ukucindezeleka kokuzama ukukhulelwa, kanye nokuxilongwa, ukuhlolwa, kanye nokwelashwa kokungazalwa, kubangela ukungezwani ebuhlotsheni bobulili emibhangqwaneni eminingi.
Ungase uzizwe uwedwa nakho okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho. Ungase uzibuze ngisho ukuthi umngane wakho uzwa imizwa efanayo yehlazo nokukhungatheka ozizwayo.
Kubalulekile ukwazi ukuthi wena, kude, hhayi wedwa.
Ucwaningo luye lwabonisa ngokuphindaphindiwe ukuthi ukungabi nabantwana kuyashintsha indlela esizibheka ngayo njengezinto eziphathelene nobulili. Lishintsha ubudlelwane bethu bobulili.
Kodwa kufanele kube njalo lokhu kuze kube phakade. Kunesizathu sethemba.
Ucwaningo lwesikhathi eside lwamabhangqwana abahamba ngemithi yokwelapha i-IVF babheka ukuthi ubuhlobo bobulili nomshado babathintekile yini ngemva kweminyaka yokwelapha. Babheka ngokuqondile ukuthi imibhangqwana yayenzani eminyakeni eyishumi emva kokwelashwa.
Eminyakeni eyishumi emva kokungabikho, imibhangqwana ilinganise izinga layo lokunethezeka komshado nokweneliseka ngokocansi ngokuthi "ngokwanele" noma "okungaphezu kokwanele."
Lokhu kwakuyiqiniso kungakhathaliseki ukuthi baphumelele ekukhulelwe, baqhubeka nokwamukelwa, noma bahlala bengenamntwana.
Ngenkathi ungase uhlupheke manje, uma sekuphelile - futhi kuzophela ekugcineni - izinto zizohamba ngcono.
Imithombo:
UDrosdzol A, Skrzypulec V. "Ikhwalithi yokuphila nokusebenza ngokobulili kwemibhangqwana engapheli ePoland." I-European Journal Yokukhulelwa Nokunakekelwa Kwezempilo Kwezokubeletha: I-Official Journal ye-European Society of Contraception . 2008 Sep; 13 (3): 271-81.
I-Leiblum SR, i-Aviv A, i-Hamer R. "Ukuphila ngemuva kokwelashwa okungenasifo sokubeletha: ukuphenywa isikhathi eside komsebenzi womshado nesobulili." Ukukhiqizwa kwabantu . 1998 Dec; 13 (12): 3569-74.
I-Millheiser LS, i-Helmer AE, i- Quintero RB, i-Westphal LM, i- Milki AA, i-Lathi RB. "Ingabe ukubeletha kuyisici esiyingozi ekusebenziseni ubulili besifazane? Ucwaningo lwe-case" Ukuzala nokuhlunga . 2010 Nov; 94 (6): 2022-5. Epub 2010 Mar 6.
Nelson CJ, Shindel AW, Naughton CK, Ohebshalom M, Mulhall JP. "Ukuvama nokucabangela kwezinkinga zobulili, ukucindezeleka kobudlelwano, nokucindezeleka kwabalingani besifazane abanezintombi ezingenasifo." Umagazini wezokwelapha . 2008 Aug; 5 (8): 1907-14. Epub 2008 Jun 28.
U-Peterson BD, uNewton CR, uFeoldold T. "Ukukhathazeka nokucindezeleka ngokocansi kwabesilisa nabesifazane abakwelashwa ngokweqile." Ukuzala nokuhlunga . 2007 Oct; 88 (4): 911-4. Epub 2007 Apr 11.