Ukugcina Umshado Wakho / Ubuhlobo Bakho Buqine Lapho Uzama Ukuqonda
Njengoba nje ukungabi namuntu kubangela ukucindezeleka ngokomzwelo kumuntu, kubuye kuthinte ubudlelwano-ikakhulukazi, ubudlelwane bakho bomshado.
Ukuzama ukukhulelwa kungadala ukungqubuzana nokuhlukunyezwa, kodwa kungabangela ukuba imibhangqwana isondelane. Kungenza kokubili ngesikhathi esisodwa!
Nazi ezinye zezinselelo ezivame kakhulu zobudlelwane obulethwa yi-infertility, okulandelwa izinyathelo ezingokoqobo ongazithatha ukuze uphulukise futhi ukhule kusuka kulokho okuhlangenwe nakho.
Qaphela kulolu cwaningo: iningi labantu (uma kungenjalo) lwezifundo emibhangqwaneni kanye nokucindezeleka kokungabikho komzimba kuye kwenziwa ngamadoda nabesifazane abashadile abesilisa nabesifazane.
Ucwaningo olwengeziwe luyadingeka, ikakhulukazi olubandakanya izinhlobo ezahlukene zobuhlobo. Kuze kube yileso sikhathi, singasebenzisa lokho esikufundayo ekucwaningweni komshado, futhi okungenani sisebenzise leyo miphumela kancane kwezinye izinhlobo zokusebenzisana ngothando.
Ukucindezeleka Ngokobulili Uma Uzama Ukuqonda
Ukuphila kwakho ngokocansi kungaba yisisulu sokuqala sokuzama ukukhulelwa .
Ekuqaleni, ukuhlebaza, "Ake senze umntwana" kungaba ukuvula. Emva kwezinyanga zokuzama, yinto yokugcina noma ngabe ufuna ukukhuluma noma ukuzwa.
Ukucindezeleka ebuhlotsheni bobulili kuvame kakhulu emibhangqwaneni ezama ukulala isikhathi sokuvuna . Ukucwaninga kuthole ukwanda kokungasebenzi kobulili-kokubili kwabesilisa nabesifazane-uma ukulala kwesikhathi kusetshenziselwa ukukhulelwa.
Ngenxa yokuthi ubulili kuyindlela yokuzizwa usondelene nomlingani wakho, ukucindezeleka empilweni yakho ebuseduze kungabangela ukungezwani ebuhlotsheni bakho obuphelele.
Ukungavumelani ngesikhathi sokufuna usizo
Kufanele uthole nini usizo? Eqinisweni, kusukela ekuboneni udokotela wakho, lo mbuzo oqondile.
Uma ngabe uzama ukukhulelwa unyaka owodwa, kufanele ubone udokotela wakho . Uma uneminyaka engu-35 noma ngaphezulu , kufanele ufune usizo ngemuva kwezinyanga eziyisithupha. Uma unamanye izimpawu noma izingozi zokungabi nabantwana , khuluma nodokotela wakho ngokushesha.
Eminye imibhangqwana ayinazo izingxabano ngokufuna usizo lapho kufika isikhathi.
Kodwa-ke, kwenzekani uma omunye wenu efuna ukuthola usizo manje, kanti omunye ufuna ukulinda ? Lokhu kungaholela ekuxabaneni.
Ukungavumelani Okuphathelene Nokutshela Abanye Abantu Mayelana Nokulwa
Ngaphandle kwabesifazane abangashadile (noma amadoda) azama ukuba nengane ene-sperm noma amaqanda amaqanda , ukungabi nabantwana ngokuvamile kuyinkinga yomlingani.
Ukukhuluma ngomzabalazo nabanye abantu yisinqumo ozodinga ukwenza ndawonye.
Uma uvumelana ukuthi ubani futhi ukuthi uzokhuluma ngani, mkhulu!
Uma kungenjalo, izinto zingaba nzima.
Umlingani ongafuni ukwabelana angase abe namahloni noma amahloni . Bangase babe nomuzwa wokuthi ukungabi nabantwana kungumuntu siqu ngesihloko.
Lowo ofuna ukukhuluma nabanye mayelana nezinselele zokuzala kungaba nomuzwa wokuthi uyedwa futhi ungenalo ukwesekwa komphakathi. Lokhu kungaholela enkingeni enkulu ekubhekaneni nokungaqiniseki ngokwayo, imizwa yentukuthelo kumlingani ophikelela ekugcineni izinto eziyimfihlakalo, nokwanda kobudlelwano obuseduze.
Ukwesaba Ukuthi Uma "Kuyiphutha Lakho," Ozakwethu Uyohamba
"Ngesaba ukuthi uzobuya / uzoshiya ngoba ngingumntwana ongenalutho. Ngesaba ukuthi bayongishiya umuntu ongabanika ingane. "
Lokhu kuywesaba okujwayelekile kakhulu futhi abantu abaningi abakaze babonakalise kumthandi wabo.
Uma ubuhlobo bakho bunamandla, ukungabi namandla akunakwenzeka ukukuhlukana. Indlela engcono kakhulu yokubhekana nalokhu kwesaba? Beka ngaphandle lapho. Khuluma nomlingani wakho mayelana nokwesaba kwakho.
Inothi eliyinkimbinkimbi yocwaningo: ucwaningo lithole ukuthi labo abaphendulela ekuziphenduleleni nasekugxekeni-yiyiphutha lami, ngilethele lokhu-ngithi ngibe namazinga aphakeme ekucindezelekeni kokungakhulelwa.
Abacwaningi batusa ukuthi amadoda nabesifazane abathile bakhetha ukuzilalela njengendlela yokukhipha ukucindezeleka kumlingani wabo. Ngamanye amazwi, ngokuthi, "Yonke iphutha lami," banethemba lokunciphisa ubuhlungu obungokomzwelo bomuntu othandekayo.
Noma kunjalo, ucwaningo lubonise ukuthi lolu hlobo lokucabanga lulimaza ubuhlobo.
Akusizi ngalutho kunoma ubani futhi akususi noma kunciphisa noma yikuphi ukucindezeleka komunye umlingani.
Ukuncintisana Nokuthukuthela Ngaphezu Kokuthi "Ubani Onakho Okubi"
Ubani obhekene nakakhulu, lowo obhekene nezinqubo eziningi? Noma lowo ongenalutho (uma kuphela oyedwa kulaba ababili), ngakho-ke unomthwalo ngokomzwelo wokuzizwa unecala?
Ubani okubi nakakhulu? Lowo onokuhlolwa okuvame ukuzala , noma okumele angene ekamelweni yedwa, emtholampilo wokuzala, futhi ukushaya indlwabu ngokufunwa ?
Kweminye imibhangqwana, lezi zindaba ziholela ekufutheni.
Ama-Olimpiki Okubuhlungu awahlukile kumabhangqwana. Lokhu kwenzeka phakathi kokuzala okunye okuphikisana noontanga , futhi ngokuqinisekile ngaphandle komphakathi ongatholakali.
Ukungaqondani Ngendlela Ezingavamile Zokubhekana Nakho
Wonke umuntu uhlangabezana nokucindezeleka ngezindlela ezahlukene. Izifundo zithole ukuhlukana kobulili endleleni abantu ababhekana ngayo nokungabi nabantwana. Lokhu kungezwani kungabangela ukungezwani.
Isibonelo, umlingani oyedwa angamangalela omunye "ongakhathaleli ngokwanele" uma isitayela sakhe sokubambisana sincane. Ehlangothini le-flip, umlingani oyedwa angamangalela enye "yokucasula."
Ucwaningo luye lwathola ukuthi abesifazane banamathuba amaningi okubhekana nokucindezeleka komshado kunamadoda, kungakhathaliseki imbangela yokungasebenzi. Lokhu akusho ukuthi amadoda awakhathaleli. Kuphela ukuthi amazinga abo okucindezeleka kobudlelwane abavela ekungenikeleni aphansi.
Ukucindezeleka Kwezezimali Okungenzi lutho
Izimpikiswano ngemali aziyona yodwa emibhangqwaneni engenamandla. Kodwa-ke, ngoba ukungabi nalutho kungabiza kakhulu , ukungezwani ngokwezimali kuyinto evamile.
Ukukhokha, ukuhlolwa kokuzala nokuphulukiswa okungavunyelwanga yomshuwalense, ukuhamba nokuya emitholampilo yokuzala , isikhathi sokusebenza esilahlekile ngenxa yezinqubo kanye nokuqokwa-konke lokhu kungaholela ekucindezelweni kwezezimali.
Imibhangqwana eminingi ngeke idinge ukwelashwa kwe-IVF . Kulabo abakwenzayo, kungabangela imithwalo yemali yesikhathi eside.
Cishe yonke imibhangqwana ehamba nge-IVF idinga ukuboleka imali. Lokhu kungasho iminyaka yezikweletu.
Ngisho kanye nokungabi namandla noma i-IVF isemva kwakho, ukucindezeleka kwezezimali kokungazalwa kungase kulandele isikhathi esithile.
Eminye imithombo ekhona yokucindezeleka kwezimali ihlanganisa ...
- ukungavumelani mayelana nokuphishekela ukwelashwa (ngenxa yezindleko)
- kungakhathaliseki nokuthi ukuboleka kanjani imali
- kungaba noma cha ukucela abangane nomndeni ukuthola usizo lwezezimali (njengokungathi kubuyiselwa abantu abaningi )
- kungakhathaliseki ukuthi weqa ukwelashwa futhi uya ngqo ekutholeni (okuyinto ebiza kakhulu)
Umehluko Wobufakazi Ekuhambeni Ngaphambili noma Ezinyathelweni Ezilandelayo
Iminye imibhangqwana ingase ingavumelani ngokuthi ingabe iphishekela ukwelashwa kwe-IVF noma ukwelashwa kokuzala . Lezo zingavumelani zingase zihlobene nezikweletu kanye nezikweletu, kodwa zingase zingabonakali kahle ngezokwelapha ngokwazo.
Umbhangqwana angavumelani ngokuthi ngabe uthatha ikhefu elifushane ekuhlolweni nasekwelapha . Bangase bangavumelani ngokuqhubeka nokuzama noma ukuqhubeka kahle. Bangase bangavumelani ngokuthi kufanele baphishekele ukutholwa noma baphile impilo engenazo izingane.
Lapho umbuzo wokusebenzisa umnikezeli noma ukunikezelwa kwesinqumo kuvela, ukwenza izinqumo kuba nzima nakakhulu futhi kunzima. Yingakho cishe yonke imitholampilo yokuzala ifuna imibhangqwana ukuba ikhulume nomeluleki wokuzala ngaphambi kokuphishekela umhlinzeki noma umuthi wokuzala wokubeletha.
Yini Ongayenza Ukuze unciphise Ukucindezeleka Kobudlelwane?
Nakuba ucwaningo oluthile luye lwabona ukuthi amadoda nabesifazane abhekene nokungabi nabantwana bangase babe nomuzwa wokuthi banganelisekile ngokwabo kanye nemishado yabo, ezinye izifundo zithole ukuthi zingabangela ukuba imibhangqwana isondelane.
Lokhu akungenxa yokuthi le mibhangqwana idlula umoya ngenxa yokungabi nabantwana futhi ayinzima.
Ngokuphambene nalokho, ngokusho kocwaningo, kungumzabalazo-nesidingo sabo sokusekela-okuholela ekuboshweni okuphephile.
Nanka izindlela onganciphisa ukuphikisana nokubhekana kangcono njengombhangqwana.
Khulumisana : Khuluma nomunye nomunye. Yabelana ngokwesaba. Ungahambi ngokukhathazeka umlingani wakho angakushiya futhi angalokothi asho lutho.
Nakuba kungesabisa ukukhuphula, cishe uzokhululeka lapho umlingani wakho eqinisekisa ukuthi ukungabi nabantwana ngeke kubathume.
Ukukhuluma nge-infertility kungaba yinkinga uma inqubo eyinhloko yomlingani oyedwa yokugwema ukugwema isihloko ngokuphelele. Kungaba futhi umthombo wezingxabano uma umlingani oyedwa ekhuluma ngokukhulelwa "ngaso sonke isikhathi."
Isihluthulelo sithola ibhalansi.
Hlala uzimisele ukukhuluma, noma uzimisele ukukhuluma ngakho kancane, kuye ngokuthi yiliphi uhlangothi lwemali owela ngalo.
Thola izindlela zokuxhuma ezingahambelani nokungasebenzi : Ukukhuluma ngokulinganisela, kubalulekile ukuthi ukungabi namuntu akuthathi konke ukuxhumana kwakho.
Ikakhulukazi phakathi kokuhlolwa kokuzala nokwelashwa, ukungabi namandla kungadala yonke into empilweni yakho. Ungase ungakhumbuli ukuthi ukhulume ngani ngaphambi kokuthi izinselele zakho zokuzala zifike.
Yenza umzamo wokuxhuma ngezinye izindlela. Yebo, lokhu kuzodinga umzamo wangempela.
Cabanga ngalokho okwenzile phakathi nezinsuku zakho zokuthandana. Noma, phishekela into yokuzilibazisa entsha noma umsebenzi ndawonye. Hlala phansi wenze uhlu lwezinto okufanele uyenze ndawonye.
Ekhuluma ngokuxhumeka, ungayinaki impilo yakho yobulili ! Buyisela emuva kusuka ekunganeni, futhi wenze ngokusondelana nothando futhi. Lokhu, futhi, kuzothatha umzamo.
Vumela ukungezwani okuhlangenwe nakho: Wonke umuntu uphatha ngokuhlukile. Awukwazi ukwahlulela ukuthi umuntu unendaba kangakanani ngesipiliyoni ngokubheka noma ngisho nangezenzo zabo.
Akuwona wonke umuntu obeka imizwelo yabo emikhondweni yabo. Ngesikhathi esifanayo, lokho okubukeka sengathi kuyinhloko kuwe kungase kube okujwayelekile kubo.
Lokhu futhi kuphakamisa inkinga ye-Olympic Pain.
Kuzohlale kukhona umuntu kuleli zwe elikuthi "libi nakakhulu" noma "lingcono" kunakho. Lowo muntu angase abe ngumlingani wakho noma angahle abe ngumlingani wakho.
Akunandaba.
Uma umlingani wakho ephula ingalo yakhe, futhi uphule izwane zakho ezincane, ingabe inzwani yakho ilimaza kancane ngenxa yokuthi ingalo yakhe ephukile "yimbi?" Yebo.
Ubuhlungu obungokomzwelo ubuhlungu obungokomzwelo. Ukunikezana ngokusekelwa-ngaphandle kwemigomo noma ukufanisa-kuyindlela yokuthula.
Finyelela ukuxhaswa kwezenhlalakahle : Sicela uzame ukubhekana nokuhlukunyezwa yedwa.
Ihlazo ligcina abantu abaningi kanye nemibhangqwana esuka ekufinyeleleni ukusekela. Kodwa-ke, ucwaningo lithole ukuthi imibhangqwana eyithola ukwesekwa kwezenhlalakahle ithuthukise ubudlelwane.
Ukusekelwa komphakathi kuye kwatholakala ukuthi kuyisihluthulelo sabesifazane abasebenzisa ukungabi nabantwana.
Akudingeki ukuba "utshele umhlaba," ukukhuluma. Unganquma ukwabelana ngolwazi nabangani abathile noma amalungu omndeni kuphela. Nje ungazami ukwenza konke ngokwakho.
Hlala phansi bese uhlela ndawonye : Ucwaningo luye lwabona ukuthi ukuhlanganisa uhlelo lokusebenza olusebenzayo kusiza ukwaneliseka komshado, ikakhulukazi kubantu.
Ngandlela-thile, ukungabi nalutho akusihlelekile ukuhlela. Ngeke ukwazi ngempela ukuthi umzabalazo wakho uzoba isikhathi esingakanani noma ukuthi ukuhlolwa noma ukwelashwa kuyodingeka.
Noma kunjalo, ungenza okungenani ukwenza izinhlelo zesikhashana. Ungenza futhi izinhlelo eziguquguqukayo.
Kuhle ukukhuluma ngalokho ongayenza uma udinga IVF, noma ngabe i-IVF ayikho e-radar. Futhi kuhle ukwenza lezo zicebo, wazi ukuthi ungashintsha izingqondo zakho kamuva.
Ukuhlanganisa izinhlelo zezezimali-ikakhulukazi uhlelo lokulondoloza-kuyisinqumo esihle. Ngokushesha lapho uqala ukubeka imali eceleni, kungcono. Uma ungayidingi imali yezindleko zokwelashwa kokuzala noma izindleko zokutholwa, ungayisebenzisa ngenye into. Akukho monakalo okwenziwe.
Ukuncintisana : Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kukhona impikiswano mayelana nokuthi ubani ozokutshela noma ukuthi uzokhokha kanjani umjikelezo wezokwelapha, gwema ukucabanga okumnyama nokucwebezela futhi uhlose ukuyekethisa.
Ngabe omunye wenu ufuna ukutshela abanye mayelana nokungazalwa, kuyilapho omunye efuna ukukugcina emfihlo? Nquma ndawonye eqenjini elikhethiwe labantu abangaba usizo lwezenhlalakahle.
Omunye wenu ufuna ukumisa okuhle, kanti omunye ufuna ukuqhubeka? Ukunciphisa ngokuthatha ikhefu lesikhashana esikhundleni, ngezinhlelo zokuxoxa ngokuqhubekela phambili uma leso siphambano sesiphelile.
Cabanga ukululekwa : Ngezinye izikhathi, ngeke ukwazi ukufinyelela ukuyekethwa yedwa. Umeluleki angakusiza ukuthi ukhulume futhi ufinyelele izivumelano ezihlangene.
Ungase ucabange ukuthi ukwelulekwa kuphela kulabo abacabangela ukwahlukanisa, noma izimo zokucindezeleka noma ukukhathazeka .
Lena inganekwane.
Ukululekwa ngukuthi wonke umuntu ongasebenzisa olunye usizo ngokucindezeleka noma isimo esinzima.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubona umuthi njengomuntu, noma njengombhangqwana, kungasiza. Uma uzizwa usekelwa, uzokwazi kangcono ukuthambekela ebuhlotsheni bakho.
Khumbula ukuthi ukungabi nalutho akukhona kuze kube phakade : Ungase ube noma ungeke ube nabantwana ngosuku olulodwa. Kodwa ngeke ukwazi ukukhulelwa kuze kube phakade.
Ucwaningo luye lwabona ukuthi imizwa yokucindezeleka nokukhathazeka iphakame cishe eminyakeni emithathu emva kokuhlukunyezwa kwe-post-infertility.
Kodwa-ke, eminyakeni eyisithupha emva kokuxilongwa, imibhangqwana izwa inamandla, futhi ukucindezeleka nezinkinga zokukhathazeka kunciphisa.
Ubuhlobo bakho bungasinda kule nzima-kodwa inselele yesikhashana. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, futhi mhlawumbe nokwelulekwa, ukuzama kwakho ukukhulelwa iminyaka kungakusondeza ndawonye.
Ekugcineni, uzoba nengane noma uyeke ukuzama ukukhulelwa. Kodwa kukhona ukuphila emva kokungabikho.
Bamba kulelo themba.
> Imithombo:
> Peterson BD1, i-Newton CR, i-Rosen KH, i-Skaggs GE. Ukwahlukana kobulili ngendlela amadoda nabesifazane abathintekayo nge-IVF abhekene nokucindezeleka kokungahambi kahle. " Uhlehlisiwe . 2006 Sep; 21 (9): 2443-9. Epub 2006 Meyi 4.
> Samadaee-Gelehkolaee K, McCarthy BW, Khalilian A, et al. "Izinto ezihambisana nokunethezeka komshado ezinganeni ezingenasipiliyoni: Ukubuyekezwa Kwamabhuku Aphelele. "I- Global Journal of Health Science . 2016; 8 (5): 96-109. doi: 10.5539 / gjhs.v8n5p96.
> Tao P, Coates R, Maycock B. "Ukuphenya Ubudlelwane Emshadweni Ekungenalutho: Ukubuyekezwa Okuhlelekile Kwezifundo Ezilinganiselwe. "I- Journal Yokukhiqiza Nokungafani . 2012; 13 (2): 71-80.